The DOs and DONTs of Writing Your Own Affirmations to Earn Success the Lazy Way

If you have a list of goals, but aren’t much of a “go-getter” and would rather lay in bed all day then do the work necessary to attain them, lucky for you there’s an easy way to be lazy and get away with it.

All you need is to practice a little self affirmation.

What is that?

They are words you tell yourself that change the way you think and consequently allow you to alter your actions and behaviors to become closer aligned with how you see yourself. It’s a matter of just lying there and thinking (the right thoughts)

In short, affirmations are the key to success the Lazy Way. 


Rather than “trying” hard to accomplish your goals, you simply re-program brain to accomplish them for you. 

You sit on back, sip your coffee, and let your mind do the work for you, completely on autopilot.

Now we’ve covered how powerful affirmations can be in detail before, but today we’re gonna take a look at how to actually write your own so that you can design and become the person you truly want to be, with very little effort too I might add.

By the end of this article, you’ll have a clear idea on how to “create your own IRL character” through the process of designing affirmations. You’ll level up and become more awesome.

We’’ll look at both the DOs and DONTs. Without further ado, let’s dive right into it…











DO...


1. Speak in First person

You are the protagonist of your own life, the hero of your own tale, the sleeper in your own bed. When creating your own affirmations, you want to make yourself the subject of your content.

It’s not about your friend or you father’s cousins’ sister’s uncle’s former roommate or whoever the fuck. It’s about you.

For one thing, you can’t control other people. For another, even if you could, you still should look out for number one (you).

 You can’t even control your external environment. And that’s okay. You’ll be fine.

What you can control is yourself - mentally, physically, and emotionally. The best way to take control of your life is to take handle the things you *can* actually control with poise and grace.

So make yourself the focus of your affirmation. Begin the statement with “I…” and affirm things about *yourself* that you believe to be true.

“I am..”
“I let go...”
“I forgive..”
“I choose..”
“I am thankful for..”

Make yourself who you want to be by thinking about how much of a bad ass you already are.


















2. Be positive

To write your own affirmations, you want to use language that is absolutely positive. Be kind to yourself. Be your own best friend and use strong words of encouragement. Compliment yourself and be genuine about it. 

No need to scrutinize or criticize yourself. You want to build yourself up, not tear yourself down. Think to yourself: if you were trying to boost someone’s morale, what would you tell them?

You must act like you are there to support a person -- and that person just happens to be yourself! 

Applaud yourself like you do for someone you care about. After all, you *should* in fact care about yourself. Treat yourself with respect, dignity, and kindness.

If someone were to tell you something to make you feel better as a person, what would they say? You know what they would say, so say it to yourself and be that person that makes you feel better.

“Look on the bright side” and think happy thoughts. Mentally put yourself on Lazy Island - relax and appreciate all that’s good. And it is all good.

You become and attract what you focus on, so if you want awesome things to come about, you have to think and focus on how awesome things are. 

On the other hand, if you think negatively, you’ll bring unfavorable circumstances into your life.

“I’’m such a failure.”

“I’m so awkward”

“I’’m a fat piece of shit.”

These thoughts are nothing but self sabotage and will destroy your esteem.  Dial in on awesomeness, rather than weariness. Love yourself, first and foremost, and the positive words will come to you naturally.

What do you tell someone you truly appreciate, love, and care about?

Words that make them feel good. Do the same for yourself.

















3. Add Emotion

Despite the analogy of your brain being like a machine, when reciting your affirmations, you can’t just be an emotionless robot regurgitating words like a line of code. You have to  actually *feel* the meaning behind the words.

Get in touch with your human side and embrace your inner feelings. Use your heart as much as your head.

You must emotionally project your thoughts  to give your words “power”. Feel what it’s like to be confident. Don’t just say “I am a confident person.” Feel what it’s like to be healthy. Don’t just say “I am a healthy individual.”

You must use emotions as fuel to your fire. Have passion and energy behind every single word and you’ll be able to create the most forceful

Without emotions, your affirmations are “lifeless” and hold no influence. You’ll be shooting “duds” without gunpowder. Emotions are a quintessential “spice” to the recipe of a successful affirmation.

See, humans don’t make 100% logical decisions. We are strongly influenced by our emotions.

Logically, becoming a doctor is a great career choice, but if you don’t have the passion or emotional attachment to that sort of line of work, you’re not going to choose to become a doctor. You’ll instead choose what makes you feel better, rather than going for the rational choice. If being an on-the-couch marketer makes you feel better, then that’s the path you’ll go towards.

Likewise when choosing a romantic partner, we don’t make a mental checklist of what makes them a good partner then decide to make them our boyfriend/girlfriend. No, we base that decision on how we feel about them.

While we may think, logically, to ourselves how certain attributes and personality traits make them an absolute wonderful partner. Ultimately, the decision to be with them is determined by how they make us feel, not think (and that’s why you can’t convince a partner to stay using logic when there’s a break up,because you’re trying to use logic to change an emotional decision, but that’s another story)

Point is, emotions are the strongest factor in what “convinces” us to head in a certain direction in life. So if you are not feeling absolutely fantastic in the reciting of your affirmations, you’re not gonna choose to embrace them and let them guide you.

Feel strongly emotionally excited and enthusiastic about your affirmations and you’ll easily be able to “go with the flow” down the Lazy River of Life to get where you want.

Associate GOOD feelings with the affirmation. You want to be feeling good about it. This will inspire you to make it true.

















4. Use Present Tense

Whatever affirmations you make, you must believe it all exists within “the now”. It’s not something you’re working towards (cause us procrastin8rs hate work) and it’s not something you’re *trying* to attain (because that requires effort, uggh)

It just is. Simple as that. You have it. You are it. It’s in the present. Right here. Right now. That’s the mindset you need to have to make these affirmations “do the work” for you. 

Things are the way you imagine them to be. 

It’s not something you will get *eventually*, but something you *currently* have in your possession. It’s not something you will become *later* but something about you that’s *already* true. 

You are already exactly the person you thought you could be and already doing the things you thought you could do. 

It is happening, with an -ING. It is working. It is going the way you want. You are doing. You are achieving. You are being.

Present tense.

Your mind, like a machine, plays out the role it’s currently programmed to be, not one it will *some day* be programmed to be. It does what it’s programmed as TODAY, not weeks, months, or years from now but TODAY.

Today is the day you are what you want to be. In fact, you don’t even want it any more, because starting today, you already are exactly that person. You’re already living that life.

That’s the attitude you need to have when it comes to writing your own affirmations; that is what is going to make a change within you.


















5. Keep it Brief

No need to write an entire manifesto.

No need to be an author of a novel.

No need to write lengthy paragraphs

Forget that shit, man.

Just make your affirmation short, simple, and to the point.

After all, we’re trying to minimize effort and maximize results here, not work our asses off.

The shorter it is, the easier will be to actually memorize and make a part of your consistent thought pattern. This isn’t about rehearsing long soliloquies like you might have done in English class in high school. 

This is about saying a short n’ sweet, maybe even catchy, little phrases that stick. It should be no longer than something you’d read on a bumper sticker. Think about sitting in traffic and seeing a bumper sticker.

You’re not reading this in-depth philosophical idea or long scientific case study. You’re reading a quick blurb -- a quirky line, powerful quote, or impactful statement.

You “get it” right away and don’t have to think much about it and it’s something you can easily remember.  The *same principle* applies to writing your own affirmations.

Make it as condensed and memorable as possible. The goal is to make it something you naturally just think about throughout the day, without using a whole lot of brain power. 

Think of it as a little “catch phrase” or motto of sorts and abide by it.

















6. Believe it

Your affirmations must be seen and thought of as facts, not ideas or wishes. Facts. Truths.

“I am inevitable”

You must say your affirmations with full confidence and conviction -- that it is 100% undeniably true. You believe your words are completely accurate, beyond even the slightest doubt.

Belief is the single most important factor when it comes to harnessing the power of affirmations. You must Believe it  in order to Realize it.

It doesn’t matter how positive of a statement it is or how brief it is or even how good you feel about it, if you don’t actually believe the words you are saying. 

One minuscule hint of doubt can crumble the entire affirmation to dust. You must be so certain in your statements as if you’re saying that a rock is solid or the sky is blue. There must not be a single trace of fear or hesitation in your mind. Fear is the killer of creating positive affirmations, so don’t give into fear. 

Relax. Take a deep breath.

And believe in yourself: w hat you tell yourself is totally LEGIT!

It’s not a fantasy. It’s not any sort of delusion.

It is a real FACT about your life. Say it. Believe it. And the more true it will become.

















7. Repeat it over and over

Now when saying affirmations, it’s not just a one and done deal. You don’t say it once and hope for the best, seeing change immediately. No.

It takes a bit of patience and a bit of persistence, which are attributes of a true procrastin8r. Take your time to re-program your brain by persistently repeating the affirmations to yourself every single day, throughout the day.

Affirmations are meant to be a *habit*, part of your daily routine. It is, quite literally, shifting your thought patterns into something completely new, so you must take the time to make that shift. It doesn’t happen over night.

You don’t develop the habit of smoking with one cigarette, but by making it a part of your routine and turning it into a “go to” activity throughout the day. Likewise, you don’t become the affirmations you speak until you make it part of your routine.

Repetition is the mother of practice and you must repeat these affirmations to yourself on a consistent basis in order to really cement them in your mind.

Write it on a post it note and put it on your desk, mirror, or bed side. Put it in a note app on your phone -- anywhere where you’ll see it and read it on the daily.

You want to integrate the affirmations in your life in such a way that they become part of who you are.

Repeat affirmations to yourself enough times that it becomes second-hand nature and you no longer consciously think of them. You want to reach the point where saying affirmations is just something that “happens” as part of your day, rather than something you put it conscious effort to do.


Now that we know  the DOs, let's take a look at what NOT to do when writing affirmations...



DON’T...





1. Don’t make it an event.

You can’t just wake up, tell yourself affirmations for 5 minutes then spend the rest of the day thinking negatively.

That’s counter productive and you’re only cementing those negative affirmations in your brain, rather than the positive ones that you actually want.

It’s not something you should necessarily schedule a time for, rather something you just happen to do, like taking a piss or smoking a cigarette.

You can’t build a garden then spend the day piling shit on top of it.

You want to use these affirmations *throughout the day*, rather than “Okay, I’ll do this before I go to bed” or whatever.
















2. Don’t worry about How or When


Of course, when is NOW, as we already covered, because we are saying these affirmations *in the present tense* and we aren’t hoping or waiting for them to come true at some point in the future. The fact is, they’re already true and aren’t something that will happen eventually.

Don’t say you  “want”, “need”, or “will”. That comes from a place of a lacking mindset, but you must place yourself in one of abundance and already having in your current situation. It’s a statement of fact, not a wish, so time is indeed irrelevant.

You don’t say a bird will fly. You say a bird flies. That’s just what it does. You must approach your affirmations in the same way.

But you may say to yourself “HOW!? HOW EXACTLY!?”

The question “How am I going to make this happen?” is nothing but fear, a negative emotional obstacle. Turn that off and replace it with a positive emotion; be enthusiastic that it is happening (with an ING).

“The How” doesn’t matter at all, really, because if you’re doing affirmations correctly and self-identifying with your words, and firmly believing them as truth, then things will fall into place *naturally*, as second-hand nature.

You will find yourself doing the things necessary to make your affirmation true. If you say to yourself, for example, “I am a healthy person,” you will find yourself, without needing to question how it must be done, going to the gym and eating a balanced diet.

In other words, you will instinctively perform actions and behaviors that you associate with the stated affirmation, without needing to think about how it’s going to actually happen. It’ll just happen.

You don’t have to know how or when, you just have to *know*.















3. Don’t affirm for other people

There are these “gurus” out there that try to convince you that you can attract a *specific* person with the Law of Attraction, by using Affirmations. This is utter bullshit.

They say you can tell your things like “Sarah loves me” and have your crush running to you or help them better themselves, doing something like lose weight, by saying “Bob is living a healthy life.”

The harsh truth of the matter is, there’s this thing called free will.

And no matter how strongly you believe or feel positively emotionally about the statement of another person, you can’t interfere with free will.

People have a choice in their own decisions and you can’t really change their mind, especially just by thinking about it.

You can only reprogram *your own* mind and can’t make others change, especially if they are unwilling.

There’s no such thing as “mind control” or telepathic powers. That’s not what the Law of Attraction is about and anyone that tries to convince you otherwise is a hoot. They’re full of shit.

Sure, you might be able to attract a specific person by being and affirming you are confident and charismatic, but there’s no guarantee that will happen toward that person, and really, you’re only changing *your own* attitudes and behaviors not some third party.

Now, there is “mind control” in the sense that you can control *your own* mind and the way it thinks and performs, but as far as “manifesting” control over someone else to do something outside of your direct control, don’t fall for it or waste your thoughts and time trying to make it happen. 
















4. Don’t use any negative words

You want to stay positive, one hundred percent, and not plant bad seeds into your affirmation.

Bad seeds are doubtful words that set your focus on some level of adversity. It creates a sense of avoidance as opposed to loving embrace.

Rather than allowing or attracting favorable circumstances, you are attempting to escape an unfavorable one. This puts you in a state of hesitation and holding back, rather than one of perseverance and striving towards a goal

You want to allow good vibes to come to you, rather than attempt to dodge the bad vibes.

“I am debt-free, I am not fat, I am not insecure, I am not awkward in conversation, I am stopping smoking”

By saying things like this, you are molding the negative words in your mind. You are focused on what you are NOT, rather than what you ARE and that’s just a weak frame of mind.

By following such a goal avoidant mindset, you will, quite consequently, set yourself up to become the very thing that you want to avoid in the first place. Often times the very thing we fear is what comes true.

You see, your emotions of being fat or being insecure are negative. As we talked about, emotions add power to your words. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. And hate leads to suffering.  Don’t turn to the Dark Side of Affirmations.








Now, after all that “How To” guide stuff on successfully writing powerful affirmations, in case you’re too lazy to come up with your own affirmations, here’s a list of suggestions that will put you on Lazy Island:


I am relaxed.I am calm.I am confident.

I embrace my laziness and work smart, not hard.

I complete as much progress as possible using as little effort as possible

I Procrastinate my reaction to emotional situations, until I can address it with a clear and calm state of mind mind.

I don't give a fuck about other people's negative opinions of me.

I don't people please or seek other's approval. It's too much work and not worth the reward.

I remain laid back and at ease in moments of stress or grief.

I lead conversations with compelling questions and fun anecdotes but let other people do most of the talking, while I lean back

I listen to other people when they talk because listening is much easier than "trying to prove" myself to others and also builds a better & deeper connection.

I get other people to do work for me. I'm a natural leader because of my laziness.

The Dude abides and I abide by my own rules, not the expectations of society or others

I create the life I want.

I do what I want, when I want, even if that's nothing.

I don't feel guilty for doing "nothing" because I choose to do it.

I don't get shaken out of my bed frame or mental frame easily.

I am honest because telling the truth is easier than trying to memorize a lie and also creates stronger relationships

I give and take "just enough". I don't take more than I give or give more than I take.

I live in abundance and plenty. All that I want, I could provide or create...if I felt like it.

Mistakes are "meh". No big deal. I learn form them and don't let them define me.

I make Slow n' Steady progress towards my goals. One. Step. At a time.

I don't overburden myself with impossible BIG ASS goals and instead break them down into small lazy goals that are easy to achieve.

I find ways to monetize what I already enjoy doing rather than seeking a 9 to 5 job.

I make my money work for me and don't work for my money.

I make money while I sleep and always find new ways to do that so I can sleep more.

I enjoy sleep. I enjoy leisure. Rest is important to me.

I take time to rejuvenate my mind, body, and spirit.

I procrastinate with purpose.

I put off pointless tasks and focus on the ones that get me closer to my goal.

I understand and respect others because it's easier and more satisfying than demanding my way.

I trust others and they trust me. I have high integrity.

I don't micro manage anybody because it's annoying to them and extra work for me.

I don't waste time with shitty people because they cost too much time and energy.

I easily detect bullshit and don't invest in someone that attempts to bullshit me.

I live a life of desire, not obligation


Now go lay on the couch and tell yourself some of these awesome affirmations. Next week, we’ll talk about how to get to Lazy island.  That’s right, you’ll be able to take a trip there yourself!

Until then, take it easy,


N8
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