Shit happens.
Life sucks sometimes. It ain’t always an easy, breezy walk in the park. Shit happens You may be faced with stress. You may experience trauma. You may even get hit with a series of unfortunate events or find yourself wrapped up in “worst case scenario” Whether you just lost someone close to you, had to replace a tire after running over a nail in the road, missed your best friend’s wedding because you were too sick to get out of bed, there’s no doubt life can throw shit at us sometimes. But no matter what misfortune you’re facing, no matter how “bad” it gets, you gotta take the attitude of “it’s all good.” Easier said than done though, right? I mean saying it’s all good doesn’t just magically turn everything that’s bad in your life into happy, happy joy joy. Problems don’t disappear the moment you utter the words “it’s all good.” And c’mon, Nate, you even said that telling the truth is the one thing you should NOT procrastinate on. Saying it’s all “good”, when it’s absolutely TERRIBLE, seems like a flat out lie, don’t it? Well, fellow procrastin8r, I suppose in a way pretending things are good when they really aren’t is indeed lying to yourself. But when I suggest saying “it’s all good,” I don’t mean to force yourself to become oblivious to the fact that problems exist nor am I saying you should ignore the misfortunes you face. What I am saying though is that you want to be able to see the good in any situation despite how bad shit hits the fan. Despite. Key word. Yes, you do indeed want to be honest to yourself and accept the dreadful mishaps you’re undergoing right now, but you are good, you are fine, you are okay despite that shit. Acceptance is really what it’s all about. You may not be able to choose exactly what happens to you, but you do get to make the choice on whether or not to actually accept it. You can try to deny it, try to wish it were different, worry about how things aren’t the way you want it to be, but all that does is stifle your ability to cope; it really doesn’t accomplish anything. No sense living in denial or wishful thinking. Aim for acceptance. Of course, accepting something doesn’t necessarily mean you like it or agree with it. No. What it means is that, well, “it’s all good” despite everything else (all the bad). In other words, while things can be quite upsetting, and frankly unwanted, they don’t completely annihilate your wellbeing overall. “It’s all good” is meant to express that “even though” things are pretty rough, you don’t let it defeat you or bother you at all.for that matter. You’re able to shrug it off like it’s no big deal and remain positive despite the negativity. You stay cool, calm, and laid back even in the most traumatic moments. Certainly, you’re not overly optimistic about it. After all, a piece of shit with glitter is still shit, just a bit more sparkly. Rather, you just accept that it is what it is. And you know what it is? It’s all good! Today, we’re gonna take a look at how to adapt this attitude of “it’s all good,” so you can keep on abiding and not let troubles wear you down. Don’t sweat it. As a lazy man (or woman), you don’t like to work. So naturally, you should avoid getting “worked” up about anything. After all, that’s just extra work, man. The first step to keeping a positive attitude and saying “it’s all good” is to not worry about shit. Stressing out and getting all sweaty over even the most minor inconveniences makes it that much harder to deal with. Worrying does nothing to solve the problem and only makes the burden heavier to bear. Maybe you got a parking ticket. Maybe you forgot to put on a belt this morning and are walking around all day pulling up your pants. Maybe you got ghosted by your Tinder date. Sure, it sucks. But ruminating over why it sucks and how much it sucks makes it a lot more work than it ever needs to be. Take a chill pill, or at least a deep breath. “Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s all small stuff,” as the cliche goes. But seriously, don’t cry about being stabbed by a large wooden stake, when you just got a tiny splinter. Making a big deal about things, and getting sweaty over it, just makes matters worse, and not to mention, it doesn’t do anything to actually solve the issue at hand. You can run your mouth off ranting and raving about how utterly terrible things are, but that doesn’t actually put you any closer towards finding a solution. No need to be so dramatic, man. Make your life a drama -free zone, including in your own head. So, in sum, the first step towards saying “it’s all good” is to say “it ain’t that bad.” Take it Slow. We live in the age of instant gratification. Want to find a date? Swipe right! Want social approval? Post a selfie! Hungry and want food delivered? Click open an app. Want a ride to anywhere on Earth? Order a personal taxi on your phone. Want a new toy or gadget? You’re a few clicks away from getting it delivered within two days to your food. Because nearly everything is so easily accessible, we’ve adopted this mindset that we can pretty much get whatever we want instantly. No wait lines. No delays. Just get it NOW. But that’s just not the reality. I mean, we’ve been quite spoiled with the way technology works and can basically say to us “Oh is that what you want? Here, have it! RIGHT NOW!” Fact of the matter is, you can’t get happiness shipped overnight. (Although you can get a moon bounce shipped overnight, and that could be defined as happiness.) Look, good things take time. Thus, adapting the mindset of “it’s all good” takes time. Rather than give into the temptation to expect things to happen immediately, instead embrace your inner sloth and say eventually. Eventually it’ll sort itself out. Eventually things will get better. Don’t expect all your problems to disappear right away. “It’s all good” is hope for a brighter tomorrow, a better future. It may be later, much later, before your situation improves, but things won’t always be bad which leads us to the next point… Don’t see bad things as permanent You may think you are “never” going to have enough money and are “always” going to be poor. You may think you are “never” going to find a partner and are “always” going to be alone. We tend to lock ourselves in a sort of mental prison instead of looking at the bigger picture and seeing the slow n’ steady change. It’s either, or black or white. We’re colorblind to the shades of grey, vision-less to progress being made. Always and never are affirmations, a topic we covered in-depth earlier. Whatever you state after the word “always” or “never”,becomes a hard definition. You essentially say “this is the truth”. And because you believe it’s the truth, it becomes the truth. If you say you’ll never be fit, then you’ll stay fat. If you say you’ll always be a low life loser, then you won’t achieve very much. You must remove your “permanence” mode of thinking and shift to one of change, one that sees change and looks forward to it. Even if the bad circumstances are rather consistent, that doesn’t mean they are unmoving, unchanging. It just means they’re bad right now. But ya know what, fellow procrastin8r? The future is unwritten. You can always wait ’til later for things to improve. Nothing is set in stone. Things can always turn (for the better, not always for the worse). Don’t allow your belief in “never” and “always” prevent you from seeing that. Be grateful for what you DO have (and don’t worry about what you don’t have) Oftentimes, we get so wrapped up in things we DON’T have that we fail to notice, yet alone actually appreciate the things we do have. We’re so focused on how things could be better, things we don’t have that could make it better, and tend to ignore how “it’s all good” already. We look at what’s missing in our life and not what’s right here, right now. You get mad that your phone battery dies, but don’t appreciate the fact that you have the resources to own a phone in the first place. You get upset when your Amazon package arrives a little later than scheduled, but don’t appreciate the convenience you have of being able to order products from the comforts of your home, whether it's on time or not. You get pissed that your neighbor took your parking spot, but forgot about the time he mowed your lawn or put aside the fact that you even get the luxury of driving around to begin with. There are so many things in your life that you can be appreciative for, you just need to look around. Change your perspective. Stop staring at the wall of misfortune and take a gander at the tome of awesomeness. We can be so fixated with what isn’t that we fail to consider what is. As the soundtrack of The Sound of Music plays: “When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I’m feeling sad. I simply remember some of my favorite things. And then I don’t feel so bad.” In other words, saying “it’s all good” is about seeing, actually giving attention towards the good things, despite (that word again) all the bad happenings. Become aware of what you complain about Complaining is addictive. The more you do it, the more you want to do it. Once you complain about one thing, there’s a slew of a dozen more things toc complain about. And chances are you have something (or many somethings) to complain about (that bad shit we’ve been talking about this whole time). But if you wanna lean back and say “it’s all good”, you’ve gotta quit complaining all together. And in order to do that, in order to stop the thing, you have to first and foremost, become aware of what the thing actually is. What is it you complain about? Awareness is key. Knowing what you tend to bitch n’ moan about can help you prevent bitchin’ in the future. I mean you might be in the habit of grumbling off about one thing or another and not even do it consciously. You just create a ranting word vomit without even thinking about it. It just pukes out. Ya gotta think. Think. What do you bitch about, dude? If you can’t figure it out, ask your friends or family what you complain about too much. They’ll tell you. Otherwise, start making mental notes every single time you whine about something. You can even write it down in a journal, save it in your note app on your phone. I don’t care. Just start becoming aware of the negativity you gravitate towards. Once you are mindful of the things you file in your brain’s complaint department, you can then mosey on over to actually cutting that shit. Wake Up on a Positive Note Speaking of notes, an effective way to get in the “it’s all good” mood is to give yourself positive notes or affirmations first thing out of bed. You may wake up in the morning (or probably afternoon -- let’s be real here!), groggy-eyed, achy neck, painful back, and immediately bring all your worries to surface. Instead of setting your worries as an alarm clock, wake yourself up with appreciations and positive affirmations. Whatever time you wake up, start it good. Start it right. Start it by saying “it’s all good” then go back to the list of things you have in your life that you appreciate in the here and now. Don’t live in a fantasy If you ain’t seeing the good in life, you’re being way too hard on yourself, man. You’re holding your standards just way too high. Stop stretching for perfectionism. Ya ain’t perfect. It ain’t gonna happen. The world is full of flaws. Your life included. Remember, acceptance. You have to accept all the imperfections you have. Don’t get swept away in any sort of alluring idealism or fantasy of what you should be and where you could be. Live in the present. Live in the now. Come back to Earth, captain. Back to reality. There’s beauty in it. Sure, it may not be as enchanting as whatever sort of imaginary fairytale you concocted for yourself and believe you should be living, but hey, it’s actually, ya know, real. Don’t bottle up your emotions If you ain’t feeling good, it means you’re probably carrying a huge payload of negative emotions on your back. Man, ya gotta get the shit out once in a while. Vent to a close friend, jam out to some music, play shooters to blow some steam,. I don’t know, something to get the emotion OUT. The more you let it linger and keep it in, the heavier of a burden it becomes. Like a pimple, ya gotta release the “bad stuff” pus out once in a while. Shit’s gross if you just leave it there. It can cause an infection -- infection of your mind. Don’t let emotions build up over time to the point where they can corrupt your judgment and have you making irrational decisions. That’s not to say you ignore your negative emotions completely. Express them but do so creatively, maybe that’s music, maybe that’s art, maybe that’s putting a Lego set together. I don’t know. Point is, there are ways to funnel that emotional energy into something productive, as opposed to destructive and hurtful (to yourself or others). Remember, minimize effort and maximize results. That’s the lazy way. You’re only maximizing effort by holding in emotions and not doing anything about them and well, yielding absolutely no results in return whatsoever. “It’s all good” if you can pour your emotions into an innovative side project or work of art instead of letting them boil over. Adapt to the situation and Go with the Flow Keep floating on. Whatever happens, it’s all part of the ride, bumps and all. It’s not always smooth sailing. Sometimes there are some waterfalls, sometimes just minor rapids. Whatever you come across though in the flow of life, keep in mind, it’s all good. Take it easy, N8
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March 2022
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