Hello Lazy Little Lovebirds. It’s (almost) Valentine’s Day, so start flapping your cupid wings because you know what that means. It means it’s time to spend your paycheck on pointless lil gizmos in order to express the feeling that’s deep in your heart toward someone special. You see advertisements for jewelry, teddy bears, and chocolate hearts to buy for your significant other all over the place. Ah, “the weekend of love” is here. As if “love” is something completely bound to one single day of the year and only able to be expressed through pink and red gifts. You know what this is. It’s corporate propaganda. It’s all a marketing scheme to get you to buy shit you don’t really need. It’s a scheme to get you to shell out your wallet and make you believe you are “showing you really care” by doing so. But it’s all bullshit. No diamond piece of jewelry or rose colored stuffed animal equates to anything close to what love truly is. It’s such a shame that corporations have banked on one of the deepest and purest forms of human connections that exists. What’s an even bigger shame is that people eat it up and believe that emptying their wallets is the equivalent of showing someone how much they mean to you. I’d hate to sound like the Scrooge of Valentine’s Day, but I hate this holiday. I hate the fact that they turned love into a profit making machine. Plus, I’m too lazy to go out shopping, wear a mask (nothing against wearing a mask, I just don’t feel like getting off the couch and out of my PJs to begin with), and find the quote on quote “perfect gift”. Fortunately, if you’re like me and a bit slothful in your ways, you’ll be happy to know that despite all this propaganda, you’re in no way obligated to take your significant other to a fancy restaurant (not that you could anyway because of quarantine) or buy them a big elaborate gift. And if you happen to be single, you don’t have to feel like you “need” someone to fill some sort of empty void. After all, love comes within and isn’t something you can get from something or someone else. The notion of being in a relationship is pushed in society to not only encourage gift buying between the couple but also to encourage the two to eventually breed and create even more consumers in the future. It’s kind of sick, they see us as nothing but profit potential and not as actual human beings. The overall message given to us by these corporate bastards is “Buy stuff for each other to fall deeper in love, then once you’re in deep enough love, make children that we can sell toys to.” Sad but true. Every message about love given to us through advertisements or marketing campaigns is designed to turn us into lifelong consumers. But you’ve got to ignore all that. Ignore all the bullshit because there’;\ one thing you have to keep in mind despite whatever sort of brainwashing message you see in a commercial... You can’t buy love There’s no price tag behind genuinely caring about a human being. You can’t put a dollar sign on deep intimacy. Anyone that tries to convince you otherwise comes from a place of greed, not of love. If the person you’re with (or trying to impress for that matter) insists that you spend a fortune to make them happy, then it’s not love they wish for, it’s materialism. And believe me, you’re wasting your time trying to please them. Thing is, materialism can’t and won’t ever lead to happiness. All it does is get you to desire even more than you already have on a perpetual loop: want more, get more, want more again. Love, on the other hand, is acceptance. It’s acceptance of who a person is, flaws and all, and wishing the best for them. That’s not something you can stock up on the shelves or wrap in a bow. If you see a person for who they truly are, not who you imagine them to be, and can accept them just as that then that is love. Accepting a person and wishing them well is what love is at its core. It’s not hearts or diamonds or reservations to 5 star restaurants. It’s not roses or teddy bears or even a velvet dress or fancy cocktail. And love is more than a fleeting feeling. It’s more than just a “spark” between two people. Love is perhaps the force of the universe that binds us together. It’s seeing the beauty in yourself and in those around you. It’s feeling a connection with it all. You can’t achieve that sort of thing by purchasing it. It’s about pulling out your heart, not your wallet. Yet we are led to believe that love is always sparkly and romantic -- that it’s always exciting and upbeat. That it always make you feel good. True love isn’t a romance film though. There are ups and downs. It’s not so much about “feeling butterflies” all the time when you’re around the other person, it’s about forgiveness. Being able to forgive and accept the way they are, even when you aren’t too happy with them,and vice versa. Many people make the mistake of searching for happiness in love, but you’ll never find happiness in love, instead, you’ll find love in happiness. In other words, once you love yourself, truly, you can then also spread that love to others. Loving yourself and feeling fulfilled allows you to feel happy. Attempting to fill an empty void by relying on another person to make you feel good does not. You can only love when you are happy on the inside. Otherwise you’re attempting to make inner-peace with yourself by chasing something (or someone) on the outside and that never works. They’d rather have you chasing after something materialistic than anything worth pursuing at all. “Feeling Good” much like a teddy bear is nothing but corporate propaganda that attempts to distract you from finding something deeper, more meaningful. Deep and meaningful things aren’t sellable and they don’t like that. Real love doesn’t play out like a commercial
You see it all the time. Guy likes girl. Guy buys girl a ring or a bundle of roses. Girl falls deeply mad in love with him. But that’s just not reality. It’s all a fantasy we're set to believe in order to make some sort of purchase. The plot (or lack thereof) isn’t to give us insight on how to fall in love, or even what love actually is, but it’s designed to sell us the idea that purchasing a product can can bring us love It offers the message that if you buy “just this one thing”, you too can have a fulfilling relationship and live happily ever after. And people buy this “happily ever after” tale, literally shelling out their wallets on a specific day. Thing is, we all want love. We all want to feel accepted, like we belong. It’s disgusting that these corporate bastards are willing to play on that deep inner human desire of love for the sake of their own profit. They’d rather push a product than teach us how to genuinely love. They’d rather make you fear being alone rather than teach you to love yourself and your own company. They don’t want us to find connection within each other. They don’t want us to find love within. Because that would mean they couldn’t sell you something, and at the end of the day, that’s their goal. If it ain’t gonna make ‘em a profit, they don’t want to tell you about it. Relax, man. Don’t feel any sort of pressure to make Valentine’s Day (or any holiday for that matter) a really big deal. Be lazy in your love life. Take the way of the procrastinator and show you care “eventually”. Fuck any sort of due date. Just because you don’t buy a big gift or go out on a fancy schmancy dat eon February 14th, doesn’t mean you aren’t capable of loving another person or showing it eventually...and certainly it doesn’t mean you aren’t worthy of love either. You are worthy of love, no matter what’s in your wallet. Don’t let any ad convince you otherwise. Take it easy, N8
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March 2022
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