Ya know something, turning 31 actually hit harder than turning 30. I mean turning 30 was like “shit man, I’m not young any more.” I ain’t sayin’ it’s necessarily old, but it’s definitely not so young either.
It’s a weird age. Because to *most* of the adult world, I’m still quote on quote “young” but to kids, heck even in high school or college age, thirty is pretty damn old.
Like I remember being just a senior in college and thinking 30 was a fucking old man. Next thing you know I’m not only thirty but IN my thirties. That’s the thing about turning 31, man. Like I am IN my thirties now and not just the big three oh.
And I realize now I’m closer to someone who’s 40 than someone who’s 20. And that frankly scares the living daylights out of me. Like, I am nine years away from turning 40. And I’m thinking back, I’m thinking. Okay, nine years, that would put me at the year I graduated college, which quite honestly does NOT seem all too long ago.
Seems like maybe a few months, not an entire freaking DECADE of time. Jesus. It goes by fast. I get what people are saying now when they say that.
But yeah man, maybe it’s some sort of quarter life crisis I’m having but it got me thinking -- it got me thinking, man, ya know--- life is short.
I’ve heard that phrase before as much as you have I’m sure. But it never really hit me. I never really thought about it. It never really occurred to me just how really freaking short this little dance on the stage called life is.
It was the type of thing I’d shove off like “oh yeah sure life is short.” But ya know, you never really think about aging. You never really truly grasp the concept of how quickly life can move. At least I know I didn’t. Not ‘til recently anyway. It just sort of happens, aging, that is, and isn’t something you consciously contemplate about.
But…You reach a certain age where you actually begin to think about age. It’s not something you typically think about until you’re “old enough”. Well I suppose, that’s not completely true.
There is a time, when we’re real young that age is some sort of “achievement” or bragging right. Being the “cool” older kids is what I’m talking about. You probably remember yelling in the school yard something along the lines of “I’m seven and a HALF and you’re only SEVEN.”
“And a half!” Ha!
Seems like once you've passed the age of twelve “and a half” you stop counting your age by halves.
And then eventually once you reach a certain age in adulthood (which I’m telling you is right around thirty), what used to be a mark of passage becomes something you’d rather not mention if the topic comes up.
After all, being old has a certain stigma around it in society. You can’t fat shame or bully but you can call someone a dinosaur and that’s cool.
Sounds like something an old person would complain about, am I right?
I’’m not really complaining though. I’m just observing.
It’s fascinating -- how old a person is can easily be the butt of jokes. Yet, it’s something we kind of all do. We all eventually get old. We all age.
It’s the way life is. I mean unless you’re experiencing something like the incredible case of Benjamin Button, most of us are all getting older every day.
And it’s just crazy. It’s crazy to me how really fast that this whole little aging process happens. Even though it’s not something we necessarily think about it until we hit a certain point in the process (that is, until we hit a certain age, like 30 lol).
I mean here, just to paint a picture.
I recently got in touch with an old neighborhood friend I used to play with as a kid, who I came across as a Facebook friend suggestion.
Now guess what? HE has his own kids!
I’m scrolling through and see a picture and I’m like:
Wtf is that (insert name)…Well holy shit! I’ll be damned!
It doesn’t seem TOO loing ago that WE were kids, running around playing man hunt n’ tag and Pokemon cards in the 90s.
Btw, if you wanna feel old, tell a kid you were born in the 1900s or tell ‘em you were born before Google.
It’s like, you look back at life and you begin to think “how did I get here?”
I mean one day you’re eating fruit roll-ups and playing Gameboy Color as a kid, the next you’re a full grown adult paying his/her own bills, sitting in front of a computer writing a blog.
Like what the fuck? Where did this time even go?
Another anecdote is my cousin, my LITTLE cousin is on his way to graduate college. And I’m thinking, damn yo! I didn’t graduate college that long ago, which I previously mentioned.
Yet I guess I have, in reality. Nearly a decade ago. I mean, sheesh.
What I’m really getting at here, and I suppose this is a round-about way of saying this, but aging is inevitable and you’ve gotta appreciate your time here in life while you have.
No anti-wrinkle cream or plastic surgery can prevent you from aging. That’s what we call the “denial stage” of grief. You’re totally denying the fact that you’re aging by trying to hide it behind plastic or cosmetics.
It’s just a mask, a false disguise. Face it, you’re getting old. But that’s okay.
The disease of age eventually kills us all. A morbid thought, perhaps, but you can be the healthiest person -- eat the right diet, exercise on a daily basis, and otherwise live a rather fit, active life complete with a well-balanced nutrition and still succumb to the inevitable death sentence of being too freaking old to live any longer.
“Memento Mori” is a phrase the stoics say meaning “remember death”. Now at first glance, that sounds like a rather dark thought.
No one likes to think of aging, yet alone death, but the two kind of go hand in hand. The point is, though, not to worry about death but to know that this day could very well be your last. Or at least will be at some point.
Death is always lurking around the corner and we’re all sort of marked by the ever-ticking death clock. It’s inevitable that we all die. None of make it out of here alive, anyway!
That’s not to say it’s a “doom” clock in any sort of way or to suggest that it’s something to fear.
The whole premise behind the phrase “Memento Mori” is to REMEMBER. Remember that you die and live life as if this could be it, this could be the time of your death.
It puts things in perspective. Ya know, it really gets you thinking “This moment, this experience I’m having right now” won’t last forever.
And that gives you motivation to cherish it, cherish the moments that make up your day, hold true to the memories that make up your life.
As you age and grow, you sort of just go through the motions. One day you're playing out in the schoolyard for recess as a child, the next you’re working a “real job” as an adult.
We tend to just let life pass us by. But if you adapt the mindset of “Memento Mori”, life becomes a whole lot more enjoyable and that little process of “aging” becomes an opportunity to learn and grow, rather than look at with distaste.
Take it one breath at a time, one moment at a time. Really bask in the beauty of it all.
Otherwise, you’ll be sittin’ there all grouchy in wrinkles thinking to yourself “How in the hell did I get this old?”
I think one of the reasons there IS such a stigma against aging and old people is because I think our collective consciousness is aware of the fact that we AREN’T aware of just how swiftly the pace of life moves.
We’re completely oblivious to what’s happening around us until we look back with nostalgia in our eye and say “Man, I miss the good ole days. I miss benign a kid. I miss being in college. I miss dating so n’ so. I miss spending time with whats her face.”
The good ole days, the good ole days. Man, the good ole days wasn’t THEN…it’s NOW.
TODAY is your good ole day. Today is the day to remember.
They say you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone (cue Big Yellow Taxi).
It’s silly how the brain works. We hold higher value on “what used to be” than what is, or at least we tend to anyway.
Be lazy. Move through the journey, the journey of life, one step at a time. Appreciate life in the moment.
Ya know as kids we’re all looking forward to the day we all “grow up.” Then once we grow up we realize, shit, I’m just a kid in an adult body.
I don’t know what I’m doing.
You think that adults know everything about adulting. That there’s this secret tome of knowledge bestowed upon you or something when you reach the age of adulthood.
But then you…actually become an adult and you realize. You realize that no one actually knows what in the FUCK they are doing. And we’re all just sort of….improvising.
We’re just making up shit as we go along. That’s the secret no one tells you as a kid. That seriously, no one knows what in the HELL they are doing here.
All this adulting stuff -- finding a place to live, paying bills, taking out loans, investing for retirement. Yeah that’s not something you just “magically” start knowing come a certain age. That’s something you gotta figure out for yourself.
No one teaches you. Just here kid, go tackle the world!
And it’s true, we’re all just kids in adult bodies, exploring the big world and trying to figure out what to do.
And I don’t really think any of us get it right. We’re just trying to make do and do what’s best for us.
Anyway, once you realize that the whole idea of this “adult world” is arbitrary bullshit and there’s nothing that age itself teaches you, you’ve come to the point now, where you can begging learning and experiencing on your own.
The world isn’t just going to hand you knowledge and wisdom. You gotta find that for yourself, man.
I mean, what’s stopping you? Who’s stopping you? You’re the adult. You get to make the decisions here.
It’s fascinating. Your whole life decisions were basically made for you and now you get to make your own decisions. Even if they’re bad ones, YOU’RE responsible for them. You can’t blame it on your mother or father.
Look man getting older doesn’t necessarily mean you’re getting wiser. It just means you’ve took more trips around the sun.
Sometimes you gotta sit back n’ reflect on all of this, ya know. You gotta really look at your life and how this all comes together.
And of course, remember that you die. Don’t be sittin there as an old man or woman looking back at the times of yesteryear, wishing things haven’t changed.
You’re going to change. The people you know are going to change. Things are going to change.
Appreciate the process.
Look, one day I’m gonna be old. Well, at least a helluva lot older than I am now. And so are you.
You can either let all this life pass you by and look back with some sort of regret or nostalgia, deeply longing for the past.
Or you can take the lazy path and be in the present TODAY. Be appreciative about what’s happening RIGHT NOW. Don’t rush life on by. Take it one. Step. at. A. Time.
I mean already, you know one day you’re going to look back to today, as in the current circumstances in your life right now, and deeply desire to have kept it -- the relationships you have, the places you get to visit, and all the moments that happen.
You already do that now. There are moments you look back upon, wishing you had knew it was the good ole days before the good ole days were over.
They’re not over. They’re happening right now as we speak.
Take it nice n’ slow, man. Abide, dude!
And don’t let age bring you down. We all do it. Especially when there’s such a stigma against aging -- all this anti-aging creams and pills you can take.
Look at it this way, if you choose to live your life, as in actually consciously be aware of what’s happening and find the little things to appreciate, then the older you get, the more you have to appreciate. Embrace getting old. Love it!
My mom is literally at the age where she’s the “old lady” that young kids help cross the street. She told me how quite literally a boy asked if she needed help crossing the street.
Now at first, she admitted she felt insulted, like “Am I really that age? Do I really look that old?” But then she decided to embrace it.
She calls it a “perk” of getting old. Like no one looks at you or cares if you make it across the street or not, until I suppose you reach that old age, where people are willing to hold your hand.
Well then again, the same happens when your a tiny kid, with your parents or nanny holding your hand to cross the street. But from like twelve onwards, you’re on your own, kid!
Crossing the street, that’s a metaphor. No one helps you face challenges or dodge obstacles, like moving vehicles. You’ve gotta navigate the streets of life yourself.
But come a certain age and people are willing to lend out a helping hand. So yeah, there are “perks” to getting old. Don’t fear it or worry about it.
Don’t worry is the lazy mantra, anyways. Embrace it. Love it. Enjoy it. Abide.
Everyone says that life seems to go by so fast, that the days keep comin’. And the older you get, the more this rings true.
Like as a kid time goes by so slow. Time goes by SO slow!
And well, to be quite frank it makes sense. I mean it’s simply a matter of basic mathematics and fractions.
Like one year to a seven year old is proportionally a lot more of his life than say, a 40 year old. One out of seven is a much bigger number than one out of 40, for example.
But also as a kid, you tend to live life so freely. You’re not worried about the bills to pay or workload to complete.
Like what are you worried about as a kid? Maybe scraping your knee and having a boo boo?
We stress ourselves out with a plethora of things as an adult and the only reason we see the days of our youth as “the good ole days” was because that was the time we were actually LIVING.
We weren’t stressing ourselves out. We were just being a kid. Enjoying kid stuff.
Now, go out there and enjoy adult stuff.
Wait what? Ha!
You know it’s funny whenever we hear the phrase “adult stuff” we either think of something dirty or of something boring.
Are you kidding me? You can do all the stuff you love as a kid. And guess what? No curfew. No boundaries.
You’re free to do what you want. You’re free to abide. You’re free to…well, for lack of a better word…LIVE!
And perhaps you tell yourself “Oh no, I got this aching back. I can’t play baseball anymore” or whatever.
Are you really or are you just telling yourself that?
And hey, maybe you have reached the age where you’re physically incapable of doing some of the things that you enjoy.
But hey, you enjoy relaxing, right? An old body appreciates lying down more than anything.
And a LAZY old body? Well, that’s just euphoria!
The point I’m trying to make here is that aging is inevitable. Dying is inevitable.
But just because you die one day doesn’t mean you have to be dead before you’re dug in a grave.
Take it easy,