To procrastinate, is to hold the positive belief that things can and will happen eventually.
See, “eventually” and “tomorrow” set the tone that whatever it is you have the intention to do is in fact possible, some day...later. Definitely not now, but at some point in the future, it’ll happen.
And that attitude right there is enough to allow you to achieve your goals...one day. Maybe tomorrow, maybe a few years from now. Who knows? Point is, by procrastinating, you are saying it is possible. You’re just not going to make it happen yet.
Key word: yet. It is yet to happen. It is yet to come about. But it can and it will...tomorrow, eventually. That time just hasn’t come yet.
What makes a goal impossible to attain is not procrastinating on it or putting it off ‘til later. No. A goal becomes unattainable when you set the notion that it will “never” happen or that things won’t change (for the better) and whatever sort of shit-uation you’re in will “always” be that way.
Always and Never. They create permanence. They make things unmoving and unchanging. There is no “yet”. It just won’t happen. Period. The end.
Eventually and Tomorrow, on the other hand, move slow n’ steady. Zero to sixty eventually. They open the door to possibility. The future of Tomorrow and Eventually is unwritten, whereas with Always and Never it has a set definition and will remain the same no matter what.
Eventually and Tomorrow allow for evolution and progress, while Never and Always keeps you stuck in the same position.
It’s better to put off things “until later” than to decide they just won’t “ever” happen at all.
In today’s article, we’re going to take a look at why you do the lazy thing and never say never, but always say eventually.
We already deep dived into why you should put things off until tomorrow in an earlier article, and I recommend checking that out before diving into this one, because this is going to pretty much expand upon that.
And without further ado, let’s dive...riight into it!
Never say “always”
Always means “at all times”. It’s the word of an inflexible bastard. It’s the vocabulary of a person with a one-track mind, dead set on their ways and fixed in their beliefs.
They see something or someone as one way and there’s nothing, absolutely nothing, that can change their mind otherwise. And even if things could change, they refuse to see it that way or wait and let the change happen.
“This is how it is and this is how it always will be” is the mindset, unwilling to change, unwilling to adapt. They believe in the fate of “inevitable”. The way things are, inevitable..
“He always ignores my texts”
“She always complains.”
“They always show up late.”
It’s thoughts like these that make it impossible to notice the times (no matter how few and far between) that the contrary rings true. It’s actually quite rare for something to “always” exist about someone or something --- such permanence is not a likely occurrence.
Chances are, there are occasions where what you’ve come to expect to “always” happen, simply doesn’t.
Maybe he does answer your texts occasionally. Maybe she actually has some upbeat things to say once in a while. Maybe that one party they did show up on time.
And sure, maybe the amount of times this occurs is “too much”, but there’s a difference between “too much” and “always” bound to happen no matter what.
Show some flexibility in your thinking. Realize that just because one thing is likely to happen or has repeatedly happened in the past (for example, maybe your friend has a consistent reputation of not getting back to you or perhaps your brother or sister has a consistent reputation of getting angry easily), but just because it’s likely to happen doesn’t mean it always will.
You must think in procrastinator terms. You must think in terms of “eventually”. Eventually, this person or situation will be different. Eventually things will change and what’s going on now will NOT always be the case.
Though something may feel as if it were seemingly going to ALWAYS be that way (eg. I’m always struggling to pay bills), you have to allow yourself to be open to new opportunities and new possibilities. You have ot believe things can change “slow n’ steady” over time and reach the heart of “eventually” coming through the way you see fit.
Saying “one day” or “eventually” is being open to any and all possibilities. It’s seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s having faith in tomorrow, despite the mishaps of today.
It allows you to see progress. Because let’s face it, any and all progress that is made takes a long ass time to actually come through. Things ain’t gonna change right away. That much is true.
But that doesn’t mean it can’t or won’t change. That doesn’t mean you’re stuck in a permanent rut. The rut isn’t always going to be there.
If you wait,if you’re patient enough, if you procrastinate with purpose, you’ll be able to see all the changes you want prevail.
Things never succeed if you hold the belief that it will always be a failure. You have to believe it can and will triumph eventually.
Once you define something a certain way, as in calling it “always” is the case about one thing or another, you make it difficult to see progress being made.
And without seeing any progress, you’ll be quick to give up. Don’t give up, you lazy bastard. Keep moving forward up that tree, to the heights of your goal, slowly and surely like a sloth.
Just because things are pretty bad now, doesn’t mean they always will be or have to be.
Always avoid saying “never”
Again, such a word creates permanence. The world, however, is ever-changing and isn’t trapped in the box of “never.”
A word like “never” is full of such doubt. It’s doubt in what the future has in store. It’s doubt in possibility. It’s doubt of what ever “could be”.
Much like “always”, never is a word used only by some sort of cynical inflexible bastard, unable and perhaps a bit unwilling to see any sort of change or hint of change through progress.
See, change is not immediate. It doesn’t barge in through your door. Well, sometimes it does in unpredictable events (the death of a loved one, a car accident, etc), but most change is in fact very, very subtle. It happens slowly over time.
Assuring that something will “never” happens blinds you to these subtle changes.It puts a roadblock in front of moving forward, ever steady and ever slowly.
When you hold the belief that something will “never” happen, you “never” leave room for it to grow or become any different.
There’s no reason to be so set in your ways or point of view that you don’t ever think it could hold any sort of variance or alternative.
When it comes to making changes, while holding the mindset of “never”, you’ll subconsciously think “What’s the point?”if it’s never going to happen anyway.
If I’m never going to lose weight, what’s the point of trying to exercise and eat healthy?
If I’m never going to make it big, then what’s the point of starting my own business?
You see how the thought process is limiting? You see how it makes you fail before you even start?
You trap yourself in perpetual defeat when you tell yourself “never”. You essentially make it impossible for yourself to ever transform into something new, something better. You lose the game before you even press start. You don’t take the time to “level up” and beat the game eventually.
Furthermore, not only do you create your own prison, you also lock away your friends, family, neighbors, and significant other in a box of hard definition of who they are and what they’re about.
This makes you unable to see when and if they act any different.
If you say, for example, “Oh she never calls me,” you fail to notice when she does. Not doing something frequently enough to be noteworthy is one thing but “never” doing it is another.
Instead of calling out the person you care about for “never” washing the dishes or whatever the case may be, notice the times they do do it and compliment them, encourage them.
People are more likely to repeat behaviors that they’re rewarded for. Telling them something like “oh you never you do this” or “you never do that” doesn’t inspire them to actually want to go about doing the thing they apparently “never” do. Rather, giving them positive feedback when they (maybe once in a blue moon) do actually do that will motivate them to do it even more.
Like “Hey, thanks for calling like you said you would. That’s awesome of you.” instead of “You never call!” is a lot more impactful.
The word “never” certainly doesn’t increase the chances of anything actually happening, so never say never.
...especially when it comes to thoughts about yourself
“I’m never going to be good enough, smart enough, agile enough”, you’ll think to yourself.
Or “I’m always going to be a failure at life”
And by doing that, you set the notion that that’s the way it is. You confirm your own negative thoughts for yourself, about yourself, and about the world.
Your brain is a machine and will output whatever input you feed it with. If you feed it with shit, you’ll become shit. If you feed with awesomeness, you’ll become awesome.
You design your own destiny through the work of affirmations. Weather you know it or not, you’re constantly telling yourself affirmations, that is, you’re constantly programming your machine brain.
Never and Always are quite strong affirmation, powerful code for the machine, and affirmations are what define your reality.
By saying “never” or “always”, you are setting the premise that what you’re saying is true, without a doubt, no matter what. You are affirming the belief that follows the word “never” or “always” and that, in itself makes it true.
Any time you say “always” or “never”, you know what? You’re right.
The very act of thinking of thinking in those sort of definitive terms makes them resolute.
You do, however, have the power to change your mind, to change your reality, simply by changing the affirmations you tell yourself, and you can start by thinking in more opportunistic terms like “tomorrow” or “eventually”.
Build within yourself the belief that things can and will change and stop limiting your potential by using such restricting words. Untie your restraints (of always and tomorrow) and see the beauty in procrastinating ‘til later.
But what abouts…
But what about saying ““I will ALWAYS love you”
But what about saying “I would NEVER kill someone”
But what about (BLANK)!?
Certainly there are specific situations that call for saying “never” or “always” about it. Never and Always ain’t always bad and you should never say they are!
Alright, you caught me. Fair criticism.
I agree. There are definitely some particular circumstances where it’s positive, maybe even necessary, to say either “never” or “always.”
In general though,it’s not something that needs to be said, nor should it be said.
Just like the “S” word (sorry), these words should be used very, very sparingly, almost removed form your dictionary entirely, almost.
Never is perhaps a sentiment that it doesn’t happen enough and Always is a sentiment that it happens too much.
Either way, things are not so definite in nature. Once you set the premise that something is “always” or “never”, you pretty much close the door on opportunity for change.
Procrastinate and wait for “eventually” to happen. There’s plenty of positive change to come….later.
Take it easy,