Patience - the ability to deliberately delay a reaction or take action to begin with, or as I like to say “Procrastinating with Purpose” is something that comes natural to a procrastin8r, a lazy person who tends to put things off until the last minute anyway.
When you are procrastinating with purpose, you choose to put off the right things in order to make the right decisions.
And here’s the thing: Procrastinating with Purpose is really just about the only strategic way to success, the only way nearly guaranteed to work. (Okay, I can’t promise a 100% success rate with Patient Procrastination but I can definitely say it’ll greatly increase the odds)
Sure, there are very rare exceptions in which someone hits success overnight or strikes it rich quick, but those are so few and far in between that it’s simply impractical to say “make the net big fad or viral hit and be a great success”. Most rich successful people have gotten there slowly over time. They delayed their achievement with patience and Procrastinated with Purpose.
Sure, you could hope for the best and win the lottery, but even then, most lottery winners end up broke, in jail, or murdered. Fact.
Patience is literally a “virtue”. Now I don’t know about you, but I ain’t a saint. I’m just a lazy dude who wants to play video games and lay on the couch all day.
But I use my strengths to my advantage and turn my weaknesses into strengths. I wanna help you do that too. I wanna help you put the PRO in procrastinator.
Let’s fully embrace our laziness. Let’s Procrastinate with Purpose and learn to be patient.
We are Virtuous Couch Warriors!
Let’s take a look at why being a Patient ProcrastiN8r is awesome and can help in every aspect of your life, from your career to your relationships, to just kickin’ ass in general.
Better Understanding of Others
When you Procrastinate with Purpose, you avoid hastily making judgements about other people. This allows you to build stronger relationships with friends, family, and significant others because they know you’re not going to just jump to conclusions
Be careful though, you do want to set boundaries and have a set of rules for behaviors you absolutely will not tolerate. Even then, you’re respectful and not tyrannical or overly-critical in your methods. You still *understand* that’s who they are or what they do, you just don’t tolerate it and aren’t going to force them to change it. You can be a bit flexible, just don’t bend so far you break.
You put off judgement until you fully understand the other person’s thoughts and feelings and why they did what they did or said what they said. You take the time to fully figure out the other person’s emotional state as well as state of mind before
You take time to ask questions and LISTEN.
Listening is the mother of empathy and also the easiest way to hold a conversation, letting the other person do most of the talking.
The best part about this is that you're really not doing much, other than...waiting to see what the person means and allowing them to clarify.
You sit on back and absorb the facts, patiently
You don’t worry about a goddamn thing because, well, whatever bullshit you’re going through, you’re patient enough to know that you can move forward and it’ll all be over in due time.
When there’s trauma in your life, stresses bringing you down, when shit hits the fan, you take the cool, calm attitude of “This too shall pass”. You don’t get caught up in the drama and certainly don’t panick.
You stay in the present and don’t let negative thoughts of an unwritten future or hauntings of the past invade your mind.
You don’t waste energy getting “worked up”. That’s a job and you don’t want that so you Procrastinate with Purpose and avoid any sort of “work” by not worrying.
You follow the rule of 5. If it’s not going to matter in 5 years, you don’t spend more than 5 minutes thinking about it.
You just lean back and accept things the way the are and realize you can’t change everything or always have things go your way.
You are in full control of your emotions and able to regulate them in order to continue your cool, calm persona
Now just because you are in control of your emotions, that doesn’t mean you're emotion-LESS. You still feel emotions and they are very real.
You don’t stuff them down or ignore them either. As a matter of fact, you are very much aware of these emotions and can *use them* to make decisions.
Controlling your emotions means that you don’t allow your emotions to make decisions for you and rather just listen to what they are saying without letting them move you right away.
You are in control. You take the time to listen, not only to people talk to you, but to your own emotions. Look to the inner-self and provide yourself with the same patience you provide your friends, family, and significant other.
You take the time to be self aware of your own true feelings, desires, doubts, fears, wants, and needs.
You respond to a situation. You do not REACT.
Response is slow and deliberate. Reaction is knee jerking swift instinct.
Take your time to examine the details rather than jumping the gun. Don’t be so trigger happy with firing off your emotions.
Identify feelings and triggers.
Be aware of what about a certain situation pisses you off or makes you feel anxious or whatever.
"When we have patience, we become less reactionary, which avoids many unwanted tensions, issues, arguments "
You are slow to anger, or slow to any high intensity emotional state for that matter because you understand what your feelings are trying to tell you from a rational standpoint, which leads us to the next part of the list.
You remain unfazed by worries or emotions and stay grounded as well as focused on what you truly want, making decisions inspired by logic, reason, and thought.
Maybe you want a stronger relationship, but feel mad that your partner forgot to put away the dishes.
You Procrastinate with Purpose and rationally choose not to yell at them so you can have a calm discussion about it.
Maybe you want a stronger career, but feel excited about going out to the bar with your buddies.
You Procrastinate with Purpose and rationally choose not to go out tonight, so you can save the money and spend the time leveling up your lazy on-the-couch business.
You appreciate the little things and are able to take the time, patiently, to notice them.
You’re not trying to rush for a BIG thing to be thankful for.
You take satisfactions as they come and aren’t looking for the “Instant Gratification”, as most of the fast-paced, Like-addicted world is. You appreciate what you have and don’t compare it to others.
If you compare yourself to others that are better than you, you say to yourself “Some day” and don’t get caught up in feelings of self doubt. You are patient enough to know that even though that you might not be at the level of financial or social success. You can get there, eventually, if you wanted to
You don’t have FOMO, the Fear of Missing Out. You’re not afraid of missing out on anything. You just do you.
You take things one step at a time.
When you finally do achieve something, a big goal you set out to do, you feel like you, well, actually earned it rather than having something you quot eon quote "deserve" handed to you.
You also look at what a person, place, or thing actually is, rather than what you hope or want it to be. You see the reality and accept it rather than trying to make a fantasy come to life.
You get feelings of accomplishment, rather than entitlement because of your patience and ability to hold off on rewards, rather than just expecting them to come right now.
Less Approval Seeking
You’re patient enough to tolerate not getting instant approval by other people. You don’t need the red bubble popping up
You do things because you enjoy them, not because you think other people will “Like” it. You wait for others to follow your lead, even if it goes against the grain of what everyone else seems to be doing.
You set fads and trends rather than follow them because you’d rather Procrastinate something you’re not interested in in order to do something you find cool.
You don’t question if people like you because you’re patient enough to know they will eventually and if they don’t, then that’s their loss and no big deal.
Success doesn’t happen overnight, but it will happen eventually. Great things take time and you understand that with patience.
Tomorrow and Later are two of the favorite words of a procrastin8r. This attitude is key to attaining long-term goals, knowing that it can’t and won’t be accomplished right now or any time soon.
It’ll happen. It’ll get done. Things will come together, if you just wait a little more, if you just give it time.
Procrastinating with Purpose and give your relationship, career, and personal goals time to grow into fruition.
Life isn’t a cooking show where you can just pull a fully baked cake out of the oven within seconds. It takes time to gather the ingredients, mix them together, and wait for them to cook.
The cake is NOT a lie. It just takes a bit of time to make.
You don’t try to cram in as much as possible into your schedule and instead take a realistic approach, giving yourself a reasonable amount of work load with plenty of breaks and rest in between.
Slow n’ Steady patience wins the race and you keep moving forward, while those who rush to get as much done as possible in as little time as they can tend to burn out.
You manage time efficiently because you put off things that don’t matter in order to to focus on what does. You delegate tasks that someone else can do, while keeping yourself on tasks that directly help your business grow.
You don’t pour your time, money, effort, and soul out into tasks that don’t directly lead to results.
You patiently take the time to set up systems that’ll save you even more time in the future rather than “get things done” today (eg. an automation system). You only “pencil in” things that *actually matter and don’t make yourself busy just for the sake of being busy.
Every event on your calendar is there for a reason, not just to fill up white space
“Patience as “nothing more than the willingness to live life at the speed at which it actually happens"
Better Mental, Physical, and Emotional Health
With less stress, emotions in control, appreciation for what you have, and a positive outlook on the future, your body, mind, and spirit will be strong.
Don't take it from me, a lazy dude with no expertise, take it FROM SCIENCE!
According to a 2007 study by Fuller Theological Seminary professor Sarah A. Schnitker and UC Davis psychology professor Robert Emmons, patient people tend to experience less depression and negative emotions.
So those are facts and real science, not just my low effort thoughts I have while laying on the couch.
Overall, Procrastinating with Purpose, that is, practicing patience, puts you into a state of mind where you are consistently “at ease”.
And that's the key to confidence: feeling relaxed.
It's not about being aggressive or demanding or LOUD. It's about being patient and relaxed, unfazed by bothersome things or people.
You aren’t bogged down by stress or worries and aren’t in a rush to fix them when they come.
You feel you’re able to get what you want and accept the things that you can’t change. You are open to hearing the ideas and stories of other people and accept your won strengths and weaknesses as well.
You're not worried about losing weight by tonight or being a rich success by tonight or building the perfect relationship by tonight. You're patient enough to put it off 'til later...much later.
All this gives you a sense of self fulfillment
Acting with patience is a way of telling life that you are in no hurry, there is no distress—only peace and confidence in your truth.
Think before you act and tolerate troubles. Procrastinate with Purpose and don’t worry. If you’re patient, you’ll never be “caught off guard” and can just take things in stride.
Respond don’t React. Take the time to observe the situation, rather than get caught up in the emotions of it.
If you are not patient, effectively, you create more woes for yourself, and don't achieve much, either.
Not everything or everyone runs on you schedule
Wait for the right moment and you may find a better opportunity than the one you could take right away.
Patient ProcrastiN8rs change the world.
No seriously, patient people are literally more likely to vote.
Keep Calm and Carry On
Patience is self control, being able to stop yourself from acting on instinct and making the decision to take the longer, slower but more rewarding path
Patience and persistence go hand in hand, but we’ll cover more details about the latter part of that next week.
Until then, try to stay patient.
"Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience. " - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Take it easy,