Ah, the shores of Lazy Island. The warm sun shining brightly in the sky, the waves gently crashing on the sands, the whispering cool breeze blowing calmly across the beach.
Imagine those soothing rays of the sun hugging your body, embracing you in warmth, as you recline in your cozy beach chair, squeezing the soft and granular sand between your toes. You take a sip of your nice ice cold glass of rum and coke. Life is good. Sounds like a nice place to be, doesn’t it? Of course it does! It’s the best place to be. No work. No obligations. No craziness or hassles. No stressful endeavors. Just full, complete, and total RELAXATION. Nothing could be better. No place is more joyful or serene . Well, today, I’m going to offer you the opportunity to go to Lazy Island yourself. That’s right, I’m gonna give you a one way ticket to the most easygoing place on the planet! No, this isn’t a sales pitch to book a trip and buy a premium vacation package. Nothing like that. As a matter of fact, I’m going to give you a FREE trip to Lazy Island as a gift for being a fellow procrastin8r, who wants an easygoing lifestyle. Free vacation? What’s the catch? That may sound too good to be true, but I’m a man of my word and the only time I LIE is on the couch, bed or hammock. (ba dum tss!) You’ll be able to fully engulf yourself in laziness and feel like the most laid back mofo in the world. Now I know what you’re thinking, because I get this question all the time. Lazy Island isn’t even real, is it? And to that I say, of course it’s real! Real awesome. Don’t shout, and throw out your doubt. Lazy Island is real and you can visit it any time. You just have to know how to get there, and luckily for you, I’m about to reveal that secret, but only if you promise to remain chill about it. Well if it’s real, where is it? Do you own your own private island? Yes, actually, I do own my own private island ...and so do you. Let me explain. You in? Cool. Let’s go! Getting to Lazy Island Grab your pillow, lie on down, and get ready to take your trip to Lazy Island. Wait hol’ up. Stop. No booking flights? No dealing with airport security? No cruise ships or bus rides? Nope. You’re good. Just a pillow and maybe a warm blanket. Heck, even those are optional. Just find a cozy place at home or at the office or in the store, wherever. Lay on back, close your eyes, breath deeply, and relax. Put yourself there on those tranquil shores. You see, Lazy Island is a place of inner peace. You must relax *deeply* and find it within yourself. Oh c’mon! See! That’s nothing but imagination! I KNEW there was a catch! I hear the skeptics about to cry. But yes, it is still in fact, “real” in the sense that “being there” on Lazy Island inwardly can affect your reality outwardly. We’ll dive into deeper details in a minute. First, I want to point out that I understand the disappointment and frustration if you were expecting a real *physical* island, but this my friend is even better. Much better. It’s life changing! See, if Lazy Island were a physical location and if it were some sort of vacation hotspot, then the happiness it can bring would be... short-lived, to say the least. It’d be a temporary relief as opposed to a permanent solution. We want a permanent solution to stress, not a band aid. But anyway, if it were a geographical place to visit, you’d go there to Lazy Island, enjoy your stay for a little while, then … Snap back to reality! After your short little trip, and “high” you feel from it, as soon as you step off of the plane in the airport, you begin to return your default state of stress and unhappiness. You begin thinking about all the things you “have to” do and the worries you let go of and forgot about for the few days you were on vacation begin returning to the top of your mind You’re back to dealing with the daily stresses and responsibilities that came before you took your trip. You’re “back to the grind” or “returning to the hustle”, keeping up with your To Do list of a bajillion things, juggling between the duties of work and the chores at home. You barely get a moment to relax the way you did on those lovely Lazy little shores. Suddenly the sound of the gentle waves crashing are nothing but a faint memory and you’re instead surrounded by the sounds of loud morning traffic or the screams of your boss upset about something pointless or the loud barks of your neighbors dog. As you sit there filing papers at work or scrubbing dishes in your kitchen, you wish for nothing but go back to the comforts of Lazy Island, but getting there would require a whole bunch of hoops to jump through, in order to plan another trip. So there you are: Your emotions are out of control, you’re exhausted, and you lack a feeling of satisfaction. Soon, that real vacation seems like imagination anyway, as if you lived through a fairy tale. Because the reality in which you live in now is nothing like the place of relaxation you visited. It’s the complete opposite, in fact. It’s exasperating and backbreaking. You feel as if your vacation was nothing but a pleasant dream and you’re awake now in the unpleasant reality.. It doesn’t seem like the trip even actually happened as a real life event. So really, if you think about it, a mental place of Lazy Island is no more or less "real" than a physical one, in a way. What we want to achieve is a permanent holiday, an eternal vacation, not just a short recess from an otherwise stressful life. We want to make Lazy Island our HOME and default way of thinking and feeling. In other words, we want to shift your default stressful/unhappy state into one of peace, serenity, and happiness. And we do that NOT by briefly “clocking out” for a set period of time then getting “back to work” but by realizing that any feelings of relaxation we would have on a “break” are actually within ourselves and not bound to external pleasures. Lazy island is right here, right now, and can be visited at any time, from anywhere. Once you understand this, you’ll no longer “need a vacation” because you’ll always be having one. Always. Vacation is a feeling, not a place. As you put yourself in a deep state of relaxation, lying on your back with your eyes closed, bringing the sights, sounds, and smells of the island to your mind’s eye, ignoring the distractions of the outer world, you’ll begin to experience strong feelings of tranquility. Breathe in deep. Then embrace these feelings, thoroughly. Hold on to them. Really *feel* how calm you are. Surround yourself with the awareness of peace. Deep breath in and deep breath out. Go ahead and see yourself, in your minds eye from a first person view, so that you enter your own eyes as opposed to seeing yourself from bird’s eye view. Slowly get up and walk towards the water. Look out on the horizon and then submerge yourself into the cool refreshing waters. Cleanse yourself of stress. Let your worries wash away in the waves. Let go of your fears and anxieties. Then exit the ocean and lay back down in the sand -- on your beach chair or soft fluffy towel. Take another deep breath Feel the warmth from the sun as it dries your skin. Feel the tantalizing sensation as you once again clench your toes in the sand. Feel the warmth in you heart as you watch the waves carry your worries away. The feeling you experience in that moment is your Happy Place, your Lazy Island, you inner state of peace. You just went on vacation, without actually going anywhere! You didn’t need to physically get up and pack your bags. You didn’t need to make any sort of travel plans. You just needed to...relax. The vacation was in your mind. It was a mental journey to serenity. And as you wake up, becoming consciously aware of your surroundings, you can remember those feelings. Remember that place. You can clench your toes to feel the warm sand, and take a deep breath to feel the salty cool breeze of the ocean at any time from any place. You can remember being on Lazy Island and all the positive emotions bound to it by concentrating and using those “trigger actions” of clenching your toes and breathing deeply. The more you practice this simple meditation, the easier it will become to put yourself there at any given time. You can eventually be able to trigger this relaxed state of mind with very little effort. Simply clench your toes and take a nice deep breath, you’ll instantly feel the sand and breeze, see and hear the waves, and return to a state of inner calmness. Best of all, you can do this wherever you are and the action that “triggers” your trip to Lazy Island will be so subtle no one will even notice. No one can see you clenching your toes (especially if you’re wearing shoes) and you’ll be able to instantly put yourself on Lazy Island, no matter what external environment you’re actually in. Grasp the knowledge that vacation is not a time or place, but a state of mind. You can control how often you go on vacation (to Lazy Island). All you’re doing is tapping into that state and training yourself to be able to go there on cue. Once you can trigger (or cue) yourself to enter Lazy Island, the inner mind’s state of peace, then you can approach the stresses and dilemmas you come across in life calmly, and no longer panic or worry. Eventually, you won’t even need to use any sort of cues and will just be constantly “living” on Lazy Island. And you will be living, actually living. You will be bursting with happiness and fulfillment inside. Being at peace with yourself and feeling relaxed in your surroundings no matter the circumstances is the key to happiness. Finding the “way” to Lazy Island is an integral part of finding your way to personal success and self fulfillment. So enjoy your stay on Lazy Island. Grab that ice cold beverage and cheers! Take it easy, N8 P.S. Subscribe to the newsletter, so you don’t miss next week’s blog where we dive into achieving both success and happiness, by visiting Lazy Island of course. And you’ll get a FREE copy of the L.A.Z.Y. Mindset e-book which will help kickstart finding your way to live on Lazy Island.
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If you have a list of goals, but aren’t much of a “go-getter” and would rather lay in bed all day then do the work necessary to attain them, lucky for you there’s an easy way to be lazy and get away with it.
All you need is to practice a little self affirmation. What is that? They are words you tell yourself that change the way you think and consequently allow you to alter your actions and behaviors to become closer aligned with how you see yourself. It’s a matter of just lying there and thinking (the right thoughts) In short, affirmations are the key to success the Lazy Way. Rather than “trying” hard to accomplish your goals, you simply re-program brain to accomplish them for you. You sit on back, sip your coffee, and let your mind do the work for you, completely on autopilot. Now we’ve covered how powerful affirmations can be in detail before, but today we’re gonna take a look at how to actually write your own so that you can design and become the person you truly want to be, with very little effort too I might add. By the end of this article, you’ll have a clear idea on how to “create your own IRL character” through the process of designing affirmations. You’ll level up and become more awesome. We’’ll look at both the DOs and DONTs. Without further ado, let’s dive right into it… DO... 1. Speak in First person You are the protagonist of your own life, the hero of your own tale, the sleeper in your own bed. When creating your own affirmations, you want to make yourself the subject of your content. It’s not about your friend or you father’s cousins’ sister’s uncle’s former roommate or whoever the fuck. It’s about you. For one thing, you can’t control other people. For another, even if you could, you still should look out for number one (you). You can’t even control your external environment. And that’s okay. You’ll be fine. What you can control is yourself - mentally, physically, and emotionally. The best way to take control of your life is to take handle the things you *can* actually control with poise and grace. So make yourself the focus of your affirmation. Begin the statement with “I…” and affirm things about *yourself* that you believe to be true. “I am..” “I let go...” “I forgive..” “I choose..” “I am thankful for..” Make yourself who you want to be by thinking about how much of a bad ass you already are. 2. Be positive To write your own affirmations, you want to use language that is absolutely positive. Be kind to yourself. Be your own best friend and use strong words of encouragement. Compliment yourself and be genuine about it. No need to scrutinize or criticize yourself. You want to build yourself up, not tear yourself down. Think to yourself: if you were trying to boost someone’s morale, what would you tell them? You must act like you are there to support a person -- and that person just happens to be yourself! Applaud yourself like you do for someone you care about. After all, you *should* in fact care about yourself. Treat yourself with respect, dignity, and kindness. If someone were to tell you something to make you feel better as a person, what would they say? You know what they would say, so say it to yourself and be that person that makes you feel better. “Look on the bright side” and think happy thoughts. Mentally put yourself on Lazy Island - relax and appreciate all that’s good. And it is all good. You become and attract what you focus on, so if you want awesome things to come about, you have to think and focus on how awesome things are. On the other hand, if you think negatively, you’ll bring unfavorable circumstances into your life. “I’’m such a failure.” “I’m so awkward” “I’’m a fat piece of shit.” These thoughts are nothing but self sabotage and will destroy your esteem. Dial in on awesomeness, rather than weariness. Love yourself, first and foremost, and the positive words will come to you naturally. What do you tell someone you truly appreciate, love, and care about? Words that make them feel good. Do the same for yourself. 3. Add Emotion Despite the analogy of your brain being like a machine, when reciting your affirmations, you can’t just be an emotionless robot regurgitating words like a line of code. You have to actually *feel* the meaning behind the words. Get in touch with your human side and embrace your inner feelings. Use your heart as much as your head. You must emotionally project your thoughts to give your words “power”. Feel what it’s like to be confident. Don’t just say “I am a confident person.” Feel what it’s like to be healthy. Don’t just say “I am a healthy individual.” You must use emotions as fuel to your fire. Have passion and energy behind every single word and you’ll be able to create the most forceful Without emotions, your affirmations are “lifeless” and hold no influence. You’ll be shooting “duds” without gunpowder. Emotions are a quintessential “spice” to the recipe of a successful affirmation. See, humans don’t make 100% logical decisions. We are strongly influenced by our emotions. Logically, becoming a doctor is a great career choice, but if you don’t have the passion or emotional attachment to that sort of line of work, you’re not going to choose to become a doctor. You’ll instead choose what makes you feel better, rather than going for the rational choice. If being an on-the-couch marketer makes you feel better, then that’s the path you’ll go towards. Likewise when choosing a romantic partner, we don’t make a mental checklist of what makes them a good partner then decide to make them our boyfriend/girlfriend. No, we base that decision on how we feel about them. While we may think, logically, to ourselves how certain attributes and personality traits make them an absolute wonderful partner. Ultimately, the decision to be with them is determined by how they make us feel, not think (and that’s why you can’t convince a partner to stay using logic when there’s a break up,because you’re trying to use logic to change an emotional decision, but that’s another story) Point is, emotions are the strongest factor in what “convinces” us to head in a certain direction in life. So if you are not feeling absolutely fantastic in the reciting of your affirmations, you’re not gonna choose to embrace them and let them guide you. Feel strongly emotionally excited and enthusiastic about your affirmations and you’ll easily be able to “go with the flow” down the Lazy River of Life to get where you want. Associate GOOD feelings with the affirmation. You want to be feeling good about it. This will inspire you to make it true. 4. Use Present Tense Whatever affirmations you make, you must believe it all exists within “the now”. It’s not something you’re working towards (cause us procrastin8rs hate work) and it’s not something you’re *trying* to attain (because that requires effort, uggh) It just is. Simple as that. You have it. You are it. It’s in the present. Right here. Right now. That’s the mindset you need to have to make these affirmations “do the work” for you. Things are the way you imagine them to be. It’s not something you will get *eventually*, but something you *currently* have in your possession. It’s not something you will become *later* but something about you that’s *already* true. You are already exactly the person you thought you could be and already doing the things you thought you could do. It is happening, with an -ING. It is working. It is going the way you want. You are doing. You are achieving. You are being. Present tense. Your mind, like a machine, plays out the role it’s currently programmed to be, not one it will *some day* be programmed to be. It does what it’s programmed as TODAY, not weeks, months, or years from now but TODAY. Today is the day you are what you want to be. In fact, you don’t even want it any more, because starting today, you already are exactly that person. You’re already living that life. That’s the attitude you need to have when it comes to writing your own affirmations; that is what is going to make a change within you. 5. Keep it Brief No need to write an entire manifesto. No need to be an author of a novel. No need to write lengthy paragraphs Forget that shit, man. Just make your affirmation short, simple, and to the point. After all, we’re trying to minimize effort and maximize results here, not work our asses off. The shorter it is, the easier will be to actually memorize and make a part of your consistent thought pattern. This isn’t about rehearsing long soliloquies like you might have done in English class in high school. This is about saying a short n’ sweet, maybe even catchy, little phrases that stick. It should be no longer than something you’d read on a bumper sticker. Think about sitting in traffic and seeing a bumper sticker. You’re not reading this in-depth philosophical idea or long scientific case study. You’re reading a quick blurb -- a quirky line, powerful quote, or impactful statement. You “get it” right away and don’t have to think much about it and it’s something you can easily remember. The *same principle* applies to writing your own affirmations. Make it as condensed and memorable as possible. The goal is to make it something you naturally just think about throughout the day, without using a whole lot of brain power. Think of it as a little “catch phrase” or motto of sorts and abide by it. 6. Believe it Your affirmations must be seen and thought of as facts, not ideas or wishes. Facts. Truths. “I am inevitable” You must say your affirmations with full confidence and conviction -- that it is 100% undeniably true. You believe your words are completely accurate, beyond even the slightest doubt. Belief is the single most important factor when it comes to harnessing the power of affirmations. You must Believe it in order to Realize it. It doesn’t matter how positive of a statement it is or how brief it is or even how good you feel about it, if you don’t actually believe the words you are saying. One minuscule hint of doubt can crumble the entire affirmation to dust. You must be so certain in your statements as if you’re saying that a rock is solid or the sky is blue. There must not be a single trace of fear or hesitation in your mind. Fear is the killer of creating positive affirmations, so don’t give into fear. Relax. Take a deep breath. And believe in yourself: w hat you tell yourself is totally LEGIT! It’s not a fantasy. It’s not any sort of delusion. It is a real FACT about your life. Say it. Believe it. And the more true it will become. 7. Repeat it over and over Now when saying affirmations, it’s not just a one and done deal. You don’t say it once and hope for the best, seeing change immediately. No. It takes a bit of patience and a bit of persistence, which are attributes of a true procrastin8r. Take your time to re-program your brain by persistently repeating the affirmations to yourself every single day, throughout the day. Affirmations are meant to be a *habit*, part of your daily routine. It is, quite literally, shifting your thought patterns into something completely new, so you must take the time to make that shift. It doesn’t happen over night. You don’t develop the habit of smoking with one cigarette, but by making it a part of your routine and turning it into a “go to” activity throughout the day. Likewise, you don’t become the affirmations you speak until you make it part of your routine. Repetition is the mother of practice and you must repeat these affirmations to yourself on a consistent basis in order to really cement them in your mind. Write it on a post it note and put it on your desk, mirror, or bed side. Put it in a note app on your phone -- anywhere where you’ll see it and read it on the daily. You want to integrate the affirmations in your life in such a way that they become part of who you are. Repeat affirmations to yourself enough times that it becomes second-hand nature and you no longer consciously think of them. You want to reach the point where saying affirmations is just something that “happens” as part of your day, rather than something you put it conscious effort to do. Now that we know the DOs, let's take a look at what NOT to do when writing affirmations... DON’T... 1. Don’t make it an event. You can’t just wake up, tell yourself affirmations for 5 minutes then spend the rest of the day thinking negatively. That’s counter productive and you’re only cementing those negative affirmations in your brain, rather than the positive ones that you actually want. It’s not something you should necessarily schedule a time for, rather something you just happen to do, like taking a piss or smoking a cigarette. You can’t build a garden then spend the day piling shit on top of it. You want to use these affirmations *throughout the day*, rather than “Okay, I’ll do this before I go to bed” or whatever. 2. Don’t worry about How or When Of course, when is NOW, as we already covered, because we are saying these affirmations *in the present tense* and we aren’t hoping or waiting for them to come true at some point in the future. The fact is, they’re already true and aren’t something that will happen eventually. Don’t say you “want”, “need”, or “will”. That comes from a place of a lacking mindset, but you must place yourself in one of abundance and already having in your current situation. It’s a statement of fact, not a wish, so time is indeed irrelevant. You don’t say a bird will fly. You say a bird flies. That’s just what it does. You must approach your affirmations in the same way. But you may say to yourself “HOW!? HOW EXACTLY!?” The question “How am I going to make this happen?” is nothing but fear, a negative emotional obstacle. Turn that off and replace it with a positive emotion; be enthusiastic that it is happening (with an ING). “The How” doesn’t matter at all, really, because if you’re doing affirmations correctly and self-identifying with your words, and firmly believing them as truth, then things will fall into place *naturally*, as second-hand nature. You will find yourself doing the things necessary to make your affirmation true. If you say to yourself, for example, “I am a healthy person,” you will find yourself, without needing to question how it must be done, going to the gym and eating a balanced diet. In other words, you will instinctively perform actions and behaviors that you associate with the stated affirmation, without needing to think about how it’s going to actually happen. It’ll just happen. You don’t have to know how or when, you just have to *know*. 3. Don’t affirm for other people There are these “gurus” out there that try to convince you that you can attract a *specific* person with the Law of Attraction, by using Affirmations. This is utter bullshit. They say you can tell your things like “Sarah loves me” and have your crush running to you or help them better themselves, doing something like lose weight, by saying “Bob is living a healthy life.” The harsh truth of the matter is, there’s this thing called free will. And no matter how strongly you believe or feel positively emotionally about the statement of another person, you can’t interfere with free will. People have a choice in their own decisions and you can’t really change their mind, especially just by thinking about it. You can only reprogram *your own* mind and can’t make others change, especially if they are unwilling. There’s no such thing as “mind control” or telepathic powers. That’s not what the Law of Attraction is about and anyone that tries to convince you otherwise is a hoot. They’re full of shit. Sure, you might be able to attract a specific person by being and affirming you are confident and charismatic, but there’s no guarantee that will happen toward that person, and really, you’re only changing *your own* attitudes and behaviors not some third party. Now, there is “mind control” in the sense that you can control *your own* mind and the way it thinks and performs, but as far as “manifesting” control over someone else to do something outside of your direct control, don’t fall for it or waste your thoughts and time trying to make it happen. 4. Don’t use any negative words You want to stay positive, one hundred percent, and not plant bad seeds into your affirmation. Bad seeds are doubtful words that set your focus on some level of adversity. It creates a sense of avoidance as opposed to loving embrace. Rather than allowing or attracting favorable circumstances, you are attempting to escape an unfavorable one. This puts you in a state of hesitation and holding back, rather than one of perseverance and striving towards a goal You want to allow good vibes to come to you, rather than attempt to dodge the bad vibes. “I am debt-free, I am not fat, I am not insecure, I am not awkward in conversation, I am stopping smoking” By saying things like this, you are molding the negative words in your mind. You are focused on what you are NOT, rather than what you ARE and that’s just a weak frame of mind. By following such a goal avoidant mindset, you will, quite consequently, set yourself up to become the very thing that you want to avoid in the first place. Often times the very thing we fear is what comes true. You see, your emotions of being fat or being insecure are negative. As we talked about, emotions add power to your words. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. And hate leads to suffering. Don’t turn to the Dark Side of Affirmations. Now, after all that “How To” guide stuff on successfully writing powerful affirmations, in case you’re too lazy to come up with your own affirmations, here’s a list of suggestions that will put you on Lazy Island: I am relaxed.I am calm.I am confident. I embrace my laziness and work smart, not hard. I complete as much progress as possible using as little effort as possible I Procrastinate my reaction to emotional situations, until I can address it with a clear and calm state of mind mind. I don't give a fuck about other people's negative opinions of me. I don't people please or seek other's approval. It's too much work and not worth the reward. I remain laid back and at ease in moments of stress or grief. I lead conversations with compelling questions and fun anecdotes but let other people do most of the talking, while I lean back I listen to other people when they talk because listening is much easier than "trying to prove" myself to others and also builds a better & deeper connection. I get other people to do work for me. I'm a natural leader because of my laziness. The Dude abides and I abide by my own rules, not the expectations of society or others I create the life I want. I do what I want, when I want, even if that's nothing. I don't feel guilty for doing "nothing" because I choose to do it. I don't get shaken out of my bed frame or mental frame easily. I am honest because telling the truth is easier than trying to memorize a lie and also creates stronger relationships I give and take "just enough". I don't take more than I give or give more than I take. I live in abundance and plenty. All that I want, I could provide or create...if I felt like it. Mistakes are "meh". No big deal. I learn form them and don't let them define me. I make Slow n' Steady progress towards my goals. One. Step. At a time. I don't overburden myself with impossible BIG ASS goals and instead break them down into small lazy goals that are easy to achieve. I find ways to monetize what I already enjoy doing rather than seeking a 9 to 5 job. I make my money work for me and don't work for my money. I make money while I sleep and always find new ways to do that so I can sleep more. I enjoy sleep. I enjoy leisure. Rest is important to me. I take time to rejuvenate my mind, body, and spirit. I procrastinate with purpose. I put off pointless tasks and focus on the ones that get me closer to my goal. I understand and respect others because it's easier and more satisfying than demanding my way. I trust others and they trust me. I have high integrity. I don't micro manage anybody because it's annoying to them and extra work for me. I don't waste time with shitty people because they cost too much time and energy. I easily detect bullshit and don't invest in someone that attempts to bullshit me. I live a life of desire, not obligation Now go lay on the couch and tell yourself some of these awesome affirmations. Next week, we’ll talk about how to get to Lazy island. That’s right, you’ll be able to take a trip there yourself! Until then, take it easy, N8 One of the laziest and most efficient tools in self improvement is the use of Affirmations.
Affirmations are simply declaring something as true and truly believing it. You can use Affirmations to become the person you want to be. In other words, if you want something, you just have to think about it and you’ll eventually get it-- and that’s as lazy as it gets. See, your brain is like a sponge, constantly absorbing new information on a subconscious level and transforming that information into our thoughts, words, actions, and behaviors. So whether you’re aware of it or not, your brain is picking up cues from the environment to produce its own narrative - your narrative and self identity. Your brain creates a “story” based on the information you believe to be true about both the external environment and internal self. This “story” is what you experience as “life”. (So if your life sucks it’s probably because your thoughts suck) Practicing affirmations allow us to consciously take control of that process and create the exact narrative we want. How does this work? Well, there’s a crazy thing about the mind: it does not know the difference between reality and fantasy. That’s why we feel emotion when we watch a movie or read a book with fictional characters in a totally made up universe. We are able to empathize and “believe” the story “as if” it were true, despite how wrapped up in imagination the narrative may be. Saying affirmations is a matter of tapping into that verisimilitude of the mind, that believability in the narrative(s) of imagination, and using it to create a *real* story. Knowing that you can literally create a story in your mind and your brain won’t be able to differentiate between fact and fable, gives you unlimited power to write your life’s tale the way you see fit. You are the author of your own destiny. The words you choose to describe your life are ultimately what determine the direction you are headed. Now I hear all the critics: But Nate, I thought ProcrastiN8rs were honest folk and only LIE on the bed or couch! Isn’t telling yourself an Affirmation that you make up in a sense LYING to yourself? You do want to take into account the “reality” of the situation and don’t want to “totally make it up”, You do want to continue to be honest with yourself, and accept the truth, but also have a positive outlook. For example, if you were born in a poor family and want to be rich, you wouldn’t straight up lie to yourself in your affirmation saying: “I was born rich” That’s just counter-intuitive and really gets you no where. Instead, you want to accept your circumstances and look for a positive outcome despite it. For example, you could say “Despite the fact that I was born into a poor family, I practice good financial decisions.” That bears the truth in it and affirms that you are the type of person to make it rich. And you may be thinking “Well, I actually spent all my money on video games and snacks at WaWa. I’m not practicing good financial decisions at all.” Here’s the thing, first of all, that is an affirmation within itself, a negative one, but still an affirmation. You can see how such an affirmation affects your behavior. Second, the future is unwritten. Nothing about the future is set in stone yet; it is a blank book. You have the opportunity to fill it in with ink. Write your story with positive affirmations. You're not lying about the future because well, it hasn't happened yet! Your goal is to make your insight come true in the future. We get to choose to affirm ourselves either negatively or positively. The universe will reflect back onto us the beliefs that we give it about ourselves. Our thoughts become self-fulfilling prophecies If you’re a worry-wart, then often times the exact thing you were anxious and worried about becomes true. Funny how that works. It’s like the very thing you were *trying* to prevent actually becomes a living hell of a reality. That’s because you are focused on it happening and have a strong emotional attachment (fear) to it. You, in an odd sort of way, made a promise to yourself that it would in fact happen and so... it did, unfortunately. You become what you focus on. Consequently, this can have the opposite effect if you remain optimistic about something happening. Basically, the future is determined by our own imagination. What you imagine to be true will likely come to be. If you believe you are an inadequate failure and say it to yourself over and over again, you will cement that conviction to be true. Your brain will help you create the story of being an inadequate failure by leading you to poor actions & decisions. On the other hand, if you believe you are a great success and say it to yourself over and over again, you will rewire your brain to believe it to be true. Your brain will then follow through and lead you to actions that create success and positive opportunities. Reputation is the mother of habit and your brain is a habit making machine So the more you repeat words to yourself, the more they become true. Repeat positive affirmations to yourself and they will become your truth; repeat negative affirmations to yourself and *they* will become your truth. Consider affirmations to be a “promise” to yourself -- starting today it is true. You promise yourself that it is and will make sure of it. No matter what. The more you repeat these little promises to yourself, the more likely you will be to fulfill them. Promise yourself a good fortune and you’ll keep that promise! You convince yourself of your own reality. There are tons of propaganda out there that persuade you to act and think in a certain way. You subconsciously pick these messages up (like buy more and consume more) and make it part of your identity. Escape the brainwashing and take back control of your own mind. With Self Affirmations, you’re ignoring the outside “noise” and brainwashing yourself with the messages that you choose for yourself. You are the star of your own movie that you imagine. You do this by rummaging over the same thought patterns until it’s wired in your brain to think and behave in a certain way. Your reality is created through a series of your own consistent thought patterns. You have the power to re-program your mind and become the person you want to be. Religions often refer to these self affirmations as “prayers”, where the person focuses on what they appreciate or what they desire. While I don’t buy into the whole “summon the big sky daddy by mumbling words to yourself, to bid your wishes” but there is something It’s not magic, it’s psychology. You think about what a prayer actually is and it’s really just reciting a sort of affirmation to yourself, using a god of demigod as a sort of external “symbol”, but really, the thought, the conviction comes from totally within. God is really just an extension of the Self, but that’s a whole other topic. So despite all the flaws of religion, maybe they’re onto something with this whole prayer thing. Studies have actually shown that affirmations can increase positivity and productivity It can also lower stress, bring higher self esteem, and promote a healthier heart. Forget eating Cheerios -- just think about it haha. Be lazy. Believe it. Embrace it. Believe you are living a stress-free and work-free life. And make your thoughts come true. Take it easy, N8 Next week, we’ll cover how to write your own affirmations as well as some suggested daily Lazy Mindset Affirmations. Subscribe to the newsletter so you don’t miss it! A new decade has just begun and right about now you’re feeling the burden of responsibility, that little voice in the back of your head shouting:
“Shit, I should do *something* with my life!” You feel the pressures of life to work hard towards your goals and become a success because right now all you’re doing with your life is layin’ around all damn day. Meanwhile, you’re told to get down dirty and strive “no holds barred” but you’d rather hold your pillow and get down on the couch. You’re a lazy ass procrastinator by nature. You don’t want to put the effort into obtaining those goals yet alone anything , really. Well what if I told you there’s a way to obtain your goals without even trying? That’s right, you barely have to lift a finger and can attain everything you ever dreamed of. Literally. You can achieve anything you want by just ...thinking about it (or dreaming about it in your sleep, for that matter.) Yup, it really is the thought that counts. Now I know what you’re thinking: I think about how I want to be rich all the time, but money ain’t comin’ my way! But here’s the thing, you can’t just *think* it. You have to actually *believe* it. You have to have the mindset that what you want exists in your present reality. And then let go of the outcome. You have to believe that you already are rich and then you will be rich. You don’t become attached to the end result though and just let it come to be. Wait what? Sounds crazy, I know, but stick with me. You are the creator of your own destiny. Your desire has to be wrapped up in your identity, as if you *already* have the thing you want. It must come from a place of mental abundance, not scarcity. And then you can have it. By thinking to yourself that you “want” to be rich, for example, you are coming from a place of mental scarcity and focusing on that which you lack. You don’t have much money and wish you did. You’re trying to take, rather than give to the universe. This creates a push/pull effect. In trying to pull something into your field of energy, it’ll resist and pull away. Think of a cat. Try to chase him and pet him and he’ll scurry away, but act aloof and uninterested, like the cat *already* wants you to pet him, and after waiting a bit, he’ll approach you on his own, without you having to get up off your lazy ass. The same principle applies to pretty much *everything* in the universe. Don’t chase. Let it come. Have it. Don’t want it. And you will in fact receive it. In other words, lay on your couch and believe you already have what you want, rather than getting up and dressed to go chase after it. That’s the big “Secret” you might have heard these success “gurus” talk about. Everybody *wants* something. Everybody craves. The universe can’t grant every single want, hope, or wish. That would just be chaos. The universe is not a wishing well but a field of magnets. Each person has their own magnet. You choose what frequency you dial it into and will draw in similar frequencies. This is called Law of Attraction or as I like to call the Law of Laziness. It can get a bit complicated, but we’ll break it down to make this as easy to read as possible. Frequencies are basically just your own thought patterns and beliefs about yourself.You get from the universe what you give it and you give it your thoughts. These thoughts come back to you and manifest themselves into reality. So if you broadcast a “frequency” of being a highly confident individual, you’ll attract highly confident individuals (as friends or lovers) into your life. If, on the other hand, you broadcast a frequency of being an insecure loser, you’ll attract those types of people. So how exactly do you broadcast a certain frequency in the Law of Laziness, ahem err... Attraction? Easy, like Isaid, just think about it. Use your imagination. You must believe it to be true with such strong conviction that you convince yourself that it is not imagination at all, but your own reality, like how kids believe in Santa. I think that’s one of the most tangible examples of how strong belief manifests into reality.. Although there’s no fat man sneaking into chimneys late at night, leaving presents and eating cookies, there is this sort of “spirit” of Santa Claus. It is their child’s strong belief in Santa that inspires parents to put presents under the tree on Christmas morning, making him as real as he gets. Now when creating these “magnets”, the words must be structured in *present tense*. That’s important. You don’t want to tell yourself “I will be rich” or “I will be confident”. No, it’s not gonna happen someday, it’s already happening right here, right now. It’s here baby! Feel it. Imagine the feelings of what it’s like to be in that desired situation. Hold on to those feelings. Maybe you want to be confident. Imagine a time in your life where you felt fully confident in yourself, when you were charismatic and captivating and believed fully in your abilities. Live in that moment. Reminisce. Really bring it to your third eye. Smell the scents, hear the sounds, see the sights, and most importantly, experience the emotions you felt in that particular moment. Feel that within you, you have that confidence. It already exists! Yes, yes, let the confidence flow through you! Let the laziness flow through you! Tell yourself positive affirmations like “I am a confident person”. Remember, speak in present tense. Then...let go! You must remove your yearning and trust it’ll happen. Have trust rather than a longing. You just have to Let It Be (cue: the Beatles) and all you imagined can manifest itself to be true. It is the thoughts you tell yourself combined with the emotional energy you feel about them that creates this magnetic force within you and allows you to “attract” those things your energy is vibrating with. With that said, you want to avoid negative thoughts and emotions. Because that’s just gonna mean a bad time. This negativity will trap you into a weak low energy place, and you definitely don’t want to be there. You want to be surrounded by high, positive energy. The lazy way to success is to use this Law of Attraction to your advantage -- think positive thoughts and feel positive emotions. Give yourself strong positive affirmations. Forget working hard. Forget “trying your best”. Just relax and abide. Your success will come...eventually. “The Law of Attraction” says the experiences you have in life is directly determined by the thoughts you have and emotions you feel about them. In lazy man terms, ...telling yourself that you’re awesome and feeling awesome makes your life awesome ...telling yourself you’re shit makes and feeling like shit makes your life shit. So the only thing you have to actually do, in terms of reaching your goals, is think that you are in fact awesome and really, truly believe it to the core, then you will in fact be awesome. You must visualize, not who you want to be or will be, but who you already *are*. Present tense. You must truly believe that what you imagine is true in your *current* circumstances. Lay on back, relax, and meditate. Allow yourself to relax deeply and imagine what you believe to be true. In turn, it will be. Now that’s easy af! You see, your outer reality is only a reflection of your inner self. What you create within will come to surface on the outside. You *naturally* perform the relevant actions to the role or story you created in your head. You roleplay IRL the mental “character sheet” that you write. You attract the things and people relevant to the particular role you choose to play. It doesn’t feel like effort because you’re just allowing your thoughts to flow into your actions. Anything you do is like “second-hand nature” and requires no conscious effort on your part. It’s like pressing an auto-pilot button for your life. Sit on back, man. Let your mind and the Law of Attraction do all the work for you. There’s no need to stress about things. Start thinking positive thoughts and experience the positive emotions associated with those thoughts. You’ll be an awesome bad ass, eventually, and it all starts by taking a good comfy meditation nap. Take it easy, N8 Next week, we’ll dive into some Words of Affirmation that’ll put you in the right (Lazy) Mindset and lead you to success. It’s 2020 and I have “perfect vision” for the future.
You’ll say to yourself “This is it. This is the year I change. It’s the start of a new decade and the start of a new me.” Fast forward about a month or two... You’ll be laying on the couch, watching Netflix or playing Nintendo Switch eating pizza and Flaming Hot Cheetos, in between long ass naps. Your big New Years Resolution is nothing but a crumpled up piece of paper on the floor, or maybe you didn’t even take the time to write what it was you wanted to accomplish in the new year in the first place, but either way, that goal is abandoned and long forgotten about. You might’ve tried to go after it, at least for a while. Maybe a few days or few weeks.You tried to change yourself into the “new me”, but ultimately wound up right back in the comforts of your same old lazy routine., not living up to those ideals you had in your head. You set out to lose weight or build your career or maybe even build stronger relationships and friendships. You strived to make something new within yourself. But the only thing “new” you managed to introduce in your life is the Netflix series you started to watch or video game you picked up. You haven’t changed much at all, yet alone in the big elaborate way you promised yourself to do in 2020 and there you lie on the couch, disappointed in yourself and feeling like a failure. Well, I want to offer you a bit of comfort, more than that feathery pillow you lie on, and here it is: Quit your bitchin’! STFU and stop complaining. For real man. Just relax and abide by your own way of doing things currently. I mean, I’m not gonna encourage you to get your ass up and hop back on track to your goal. No. What I am gonna tell you though is that you have to accept who you are, laziness and all, before setting out to make any ridiculous changes to your habits or routine. Your goal this year should be one of acceptance, not change. Don’t feel bad about your laziness and instead, embrace it. Seriously, be lazy. Just don’t sit there and “mope” about it. Feel good for choosing to splurge on pizza instead of practicing a healthy diet. Love the fact that you binge Netflix instead of reps at the gym. Be proud of what you already do...or don’t do for that matter. Be proud of who you *already* are...and how damn lazy you are. Be comfortable on *your own* couch and don’t try to build a new one. That’s a lot of intense labor. Lay back n’ chill. Be happy you know how to take it easy and totally engulf yourself in leisure, allowing yourself a break from work. Every year people try to make a big “new year, new me” transformation And every year I remind you that New Year’s Resolutions are bullshit. You’re not gonna transform. You’re not gonna change. You’re not gonna achieve that BIG 2020 goal....and that’s completely okay. You have to take the attitude of “I’m always going to be this way. I’m always going to be a lazy ass.” and I don’t mean in a “oh woe is me. I’ll never amount to anything” sort of way, but in a “Hell yeah, I love doing nothing!” sort of way. You have to accept your current circumstances and personal attributes before trying to transform it or whatever. Have some self esteem, damnit! Once you accept who you truly are, only then can you begin to make changes. The reason you aren’t able to attain your New Years Resolution, and why I call it bullshit, is because this goal is usually NOT congruent with your current identity, who you are in the present. You see yourself as a lazy sack of shit and are trying to make goals of a marathon runner. It ain’t gonna work, bud. It’s like trying to give a Water Gun TM to Charmander. He’s fire type and can’t learn that type of move. Likewise, you can’t learn or accomplish things that don’t match your “type” of person. So since you’re a Slaking (spiritually), teach yourself Rest. You’ll be able to actually do that and set yourself up for...wait for...it SUCCESSS! Don’t set yourself up for the impossible and go try to attain something that, quite simply, isn’t in your nature. The epiphany you’ll set yourself up to learn is [SPOILER ALERT]: “Wow I can achieve what I want based on how I view myself.” And that’s exactly the mindset you want to achieve. This allows you to “shift ”into a new set of beliefs about yourself and be able to achieve goals relevant to that new identity *naturally* You become what you believe you are. You achieve goals relevant to the role you believe yourself to be. So if you see yourself as a lazy fat piece of shit, you’re achieve goals relevant to what a lazy fat piece of shit achieves, like eating a whole bag of Cheetos, a box of pizza, and a two liter Mountain Dew and watching an entire season on Netflix, because that’s what a fat lazy piece of shit does. Likewise, if you see yourself as a healthy fitness lover, you’re going to achieve goals relevant to what a healthy fitness lover achieves, like going to the gym every day and eating a healthy diet. I’m not saying you should choose one lifestyle over the other. Do what you want man. Be who want. But play your role. And play the one you currently chose for yourself. Realize that it was in fact a choice and you are free to “create your own character” If you choose to be a warrior don’t get upset that you’re not casting meteor spells down from the sky. Swing your sword and strut around in your heavy plated mail armor with pride. Just like your DnD character, know your IRL character’s abilities and limitations and don’t “try” to do something you can’t do in the “class” you chose. I say you chose, because whether consciously or subconsciously, you told yourself words, you fed yourself thoughts, that made you *believe* everything you believe about yourself to be true, that made you believe you fit a certain role in life. While you may not have been consciously aware of it at the time, you *chose* to attach yourself to certain words and principles and that is what built your current self, or idea of self. You see because “self” is just an idea. You can change this idea of self to be...whatever you want it to be, man. It is not so much about changing your ways, but about changing your IDEAS. You are the creator of your own destiny. You write your own IRL character sheet based on the *ideas* you have in your head. Basically, most of the work in goal achievement comes down to your own self perception, the class that you choose for yourself, the ideas you create. You don’t have to try a damned thing to achieve anything. It just sort of...happens. While teaching the powers of the Force, Luke doubts himself about lifting a ship out of a swamp, Yoda famously says: “Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.” Luke didn’t *believe* he was a Jedi or master of the Force and thought didn’t have it in him to have the strength to lift the ship. He didn’t identify as the role that would allow him to accomplish the task with ease. He felt he had to “try” because he identified as a dude from the sand, not a Jedi. Once he believed himself that he was in fact a Jedi, he was able to use the Force and lift the ship, with very little effort too I might add. Nothing is difficult when you are what you need to be, when you identify as what you need to be and actually believe it, fully, within yourself. Remember, doubt is the essence of failure, so don’t doubt yourself dude. It’s not about beliving “you can do it”. Rather, it’s about believing you already *are*. If you believe you are not the type of person who exercises or eats healthy but “need to lose weight”, then you’re doubting that you are capable of doing so because you identify as a role that feels the need to “try”, rather than believing you are a fit person who can just do it *naturally* without any effort because it’s just a part of who you are. No matter how much you believe you “can” lose weight, no matter how much you “try”, you won’t be able to achieve your goal because fundamentally you believe you are not that type of person. You don’t identify as someone who will achieve it and that sets you up for failure. The phrase “Try-hard” used to describe someone implies that the person is not being genuine with who they are or who they see themselves as deep within. People easily pick up on this type of behavior and usually cringe at it. If you’re trying to be more social, for example, that is the mistake within itself, because again, you are “trying”, rather than just “being”. Do or Do Not. There is no try. You may go in with the approach of: “I am an awkward person trying my best to make friends” Or you could say: “I am a calm confident person who easily make friends.” See the difference? In one, you identify as someone who isn’t capable of being charismatic, confident, and social. You create the idea that you are awkward and unable to build rapport, at the very core. You put in effort to “try” and do something outside of the role you chose to play. In the other, there is NO effort involved. Things just fall into place *naturally*. You are *already* someone who is likeable and builds friendships (or relationships for that matter) with ease. There’s nothing further to be done. There’s no improvement to make.The work takes care of itself. See, your brain is like a machine that is set to run and perform whatever you program it to do. By telling it, “You are this”, then you’ll be the very thing you said you are and perform relevant actions and behaviors to that program. You don’t have to do much. You’re like a pilot of a ship that can lean on back and drink coffee while the brain (ship) travels to where you set it to go.The process is very automatic and lazy as hell. You no longer “work hard” or “try your best” to achieve your goals, 2020 New Years Resolution, but just “let it be” and let it happen, without any strenuous work or effort on your part. Feed your brain the right source code to match what you want to become, and chill in auto-pilot, rather than “trying” to drive in manual. But before you can “re-write” this code. You have to go in, to the source, look deep inside yourself, and “read” how the code is already written. You must understand your current brain program before you go about re-writing the source and let it run "as is". You must understand yourself, accept it. Fully. You don't have to like it. But accept it, and do (or don’t do) the actions and behaviors that are a part of who you are in the present, not who you think you could be or should be or even want to be. Be who you are first. The change comes later. Later, like a true procrastinator. Run the program that’s already in your brain So you got Lazy Dude v. 3.14 software package installed, well then be lazy, embrace it, fully and completely. You’ll install an upgrade...eventually, when you get to it. Take notice of the things you say about yourself. Examine the things that you manage to do, naturally, with little or no effort. Explore your inner thoughts and feelings. Write them down. Or don’t ‘cause that might just be a little too much work for you at this point, but do at least be *aware* of your thought process and emotional experiences and how those thoughts and feelings are *congruent* with your words, behaviors, and actions. You’ll see how the mental IRL “character sheet” you create directly determines You think to yourself that you’re a lazy person. You idenitfy as a procrastinator. You then perform the action (or inaction I suppose) of spending all day in bed. There’s the congruence of your thoughts, your self belief and identity, with your actions. You played the role of your a lazy person, which is exactly what is written on your “inner” character sheet you created. You ran the Lazy Dude v. 3.14 program within your brain and performed a day long nap without any effort. Being consciously aware of how these thoughts reflect your behaviors allows you to begin to realize this one important dose of wisdom: The inner becomes the outer. That is, you only accomplish on the outside world what you think you *are* on the inside. You set your own mental compass in the direction you will travel. You’ll understand that self awareness (the self you believe yourself to be) is key to making external goals in your health, finances, or relationships come to life. It is then, and only then, once you have this experience of seeing your thoughts manifest themselves into reality and understand this fundamental truth of the universe: that you are the creator, you can then have the power to think and manifest anything you desire by simply believing it’s who you are and that it already exists and is true. You create for yourself your outer reality through your inner thoughts. Attaining something comes from the belief that you already have it, rather than the feeling you must “try” to get it. It must not come from a place of lack or scarcity, but of abundance. The Lazy mindset is an Abundance Mindset. All you do is lay there, on the comforts of your couch or bed, and think about who you are and what you believe to be true about yourself. Your body will follow your mind. Your actions will flow along with your thoughts, in the lazy rive rof life. By performing the very simple and lazy thought process of ….*imagination* you can begin to well *actually* make a new you. Your brain is powerful af so let it do the work for you, rather than working hard yourself to try and attain any big ass goals in the next coming year. Take it easy, N8 |
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. Archives
March 2022
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